If your spouse allowed their child and partner to move into your house while expecting a baby and not paying any rent or bills, how would you feel?
It was five years ago when this 53-year-old man’s 19-year-old stepdaughter started dating a 16-year-old boy. His 43-year-old wife would allow his stepdaughter’s boyfriend to sleep over at their house from time to time.
“When he wasn’t allowed, he’d sneak in, hide in the closet, hide under the bed, or break into vacant apartments near us (he was arrested for trespassing). His home is 100 miles away,” he explained.
“If I’d give in and say he could stay one night, and it would turn into 7. My wife has zero ability to tell her daughter what to do. After she graduated [from] high school, she moved to another state, leaving him behind.”
“She told my wife she realized she would never get away from him if she stayed home, and he would hold her back. My greatest fear was that he would get her pregnant, he wouldn’t be able to take care of her (he didn’t graduate high school), and raising the baby would fall on [my wife and me].”
One day, his stepdaughter came back to their house to pick up the rest of her belongings, and she met up with her ex-boyfriend to exchange some of their things.
His stepdaughter told his wife that she didn’t get involved again with her ex and kept their interaction professional. Then, his stepdaughter went back to her new home.
But in March, his stepdaughter told him and his wife that she was pregnant and her baby was arriving in August. He and his wife told his stepdaughter she could not move back in with them and that her ex turned baby daddy had to hurry up and get a job, since this was definitely his baby.
His daughter’s baby daddy argued that he was unable to find a job in their city if he didn’t have a house to stay in. He and his wife gave his stepdaughter and her baby daddy a month to save up their money and move out of their house.
“That was 4 months ago. My stepdaughter said they can’t save money because she’s paying for her baby shower. The dishes and trash sit for days at a time. They both have jobs, and combined make at least $1,000 a week,” he added.
“My wife, who told me they wouldn’t be allowed to live here with the baby, has now switched to, ‘I’m not kicking out my daughter and grandbaby.'”
“I am struggling to pay the bills. I work a full-time job, have a small side hustle that pays $300 a month, and I do Instacart on one of my days off. This week, I used two PTO days to do Instacart for rent. I sold my plasma. I still had to ask my parents for help.”
He brought up his stepdaughter’s baby daddy getting on the lease, and then they all could come up with $150 a week each to cover the costs of their rent and household expenses.
His wife shut that down instantly and threatened to move out of the house along with his stepdaughter and baby daddy. What’s funny to him is that his wife doesn’t make enough money to pay the bills without him.
He’s left wondering if he’s a jerk for expecting his stepdaughter and her baby daddy to help pitch in and pay the bills if they’re going to be living with them.
He and his wife literally cannot afford to support these people, so it’s crazy to me that his wife is willing to put them all in further financial ruin trying to do that.
He should totally let his wife move out with her stepdaughter and the baby daddy, or better yet, he should move out and cut his losses.
He should absolutely not stick around and let these people bring him down. His wife is the biggest issue here for letting grown adults take advantage of them.
What do you think?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
