If your spouse repeatedly failed you when it came to money and pushed your marriage to the absolute brink, how would you determine when to walk away? How many chances are too many?
Three days ago, this woman was served eviction papers. She and her husband live in a trailer, and her husband was in charge of paying the rent on their lot. Apparently, he hasn’t paid their rent in a long time.
“We have always had separate accounts and never really cared for joint accounts. We both work, and we both pay bills. And I didn’t think I needed to audit his spending….until all of this happened,” she explained.
Luckily, she was able to contact the Vice President of regional management in their trailer park, and this woman agreed to put her on a payment plan to pay the back rent while holding off on their eviction. She is extremely grateful for that, but her husband is the problem.
“But I’m at this point where this is the SECOND time something financially serious has happened; the first time our car got repoed. Again, same financial issues. This time our home might get taken away,” she added.
“I had a discussion with him without our daughter present (she was at grandma’s) and told him, ‘I love you, but I love our daughter more. And you need to realize this is a very serious situation. And if you cannot be financially responsible, you will no longer be financially responsible for her. I will. You will still see her and be her father; I won’t take that away, but I will be her primary.'”
So yes, she gave her husband an ultimatum, and their marriage is going to end in a divorce if he doesn’t get his act together. This is absolutely not a conversation she wanted to have with him, but it had to be done.
She is going to give her husband one final chance here, but she is doubting if being married to him is the right move. She’s the one who is taking care of everything, and she’s exhausted from the responsibilities piled on her plate.
“I’m stressed. And now I’m setting up a joint account to babysit his money. I don’t wanna weaponize his finances, but I feel like I don’t have a choice,” she concluded.
This is not a tiny slip-up; her husband has a track record of financial irresponsibility. Her husband already got a car repossessed, which is bad enough, and then to get eviction papers on top of that means he has not learned any lessons.
It sounds to me like her husband is taking advantage of her by letting her pay the lion’s share of their bills, so considering all of that, I don’t think staying in her marriage is a safe idea.
He’s clearly not motivated enough to act like an adult, and having to police his bank account and spending habits is ridiculous (and something she should have done as soon as the car got taken away from them).
Three strikes you’re out is way too reasonable for her husband. She should just be done with him now and save herself the headache of having to clean up another one of his disasters.
What advice do you have for her?
You can read the original post below.
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
