Relationships with large age gaps are often controversial. Most people agree it’s not age alone that’s the problem. The concern is when there’s a significant imbalance in life experience, financial independence, and decision-making.
TikToker @knotyomama0 has spent years watching a relationship unfold that, in her opinion, was built on the foundation of control rather than love.
When her dad was 32, he married a 19-year-old immigrant who did not speak much English. To this day, they are still together.
“It’s been over 20 years, but I genuinely know that he targeted this girl at the time because she was going to be easy to manipulate and groom,” said @knotyomama0. “Long story short, when they met, this girl was in college to better herself.”
However, @knotyomama0’s dad told her now-stepmother to stop going to college, and she listened to him. She ended up getting pregnant with @knotyomama0’s half-sister and half-brother.
She is currently a stay-at-home mom, while her husband controls her every move through the phone.
“My dad would be on deployment, but he would be able to tell her a rundown of what she needs to do throughout the day over the phone, and she would do it,” said @knotyomama0. “Why? Because that’s the only real adult that she’s ever seen in her life.”
When they met, he promised to provide her with a big house, a big ring, and a beautiful life for their children. Sadly, her stepmother left her family in Mexico to try to better herself in another country, but still has nothing to show for it.
Twenty years later, her stepmother finally got the large ring. But she works as a lunch lady and lives in Compton, California, in a modest three-bedroom, two-bathroom apartment with a couple of broken-down cars parked out front.
In the comments section, many TikTok users shared about similar relationship dynamics they had either witnessed or experienced for themselves.
“Same. My dad was in his forties, and she was 17. Now, he wonders why his kids hate him,” stated one user.
“My father is dating someone in her mid-thirties so he can manipulate and have financial control while she takes care of him. She’s using him for money, and he’s blind to it,” commented another.
“My ex-husband is trying to talk to barely turned 18-year-olds, and he is about to be 41. Mind you, the only reason I found this out is because he requested my barely turned 18 little cousin who just graduated a couple of months ago,” wrote a third.
“My ex and I had so many problems because I wasn’t dumb enough to be manipulated. During an argument, he said if I were 20 years old, he would keep me, but since I was in my thirties, it was too hard to tame me. We were 13 years apart. He proved my point about men wanting control,” added someone else.
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By Emily Chan
Emily Chan is a writer who covers lifestyle and news content. She graduated from Michigan State University with a degree in... More about Emily Chan
