Buying a house with someone is a big commitment, and it can be harder to extract yourself from that than from a marriage. How would you feel if you made the leap, bought a house with your partner, and then found out they slept with someone else while on vacation with their friends?
This 28-year-old man and his 34-year-old girlfriend literally just bought a home together, and they were set to move into their new place this summer. In their area, as soon as your offer is accepted, that’s it; there is no way out.
His girlfriend went on vacation with her five gay male best friends two weeks ago. He didn’t have a problem with this, as he and his girlfriend trust one another implicitly.
Also, they have serious ties to each other, given the house they bought and their joint bank accounts. His plan was to propose to his girlfriend this summer to make things even more official.
Now, he struggles with being all alone, and before his girlfriend went on her trip, he pulled back from her and blamed it all on work.
As a matter of fact, he had a lot of anxiety about his girlfriend being gone for an entire week, and something deep down told him it was going to go wrong.
But he waved his gut feeling away, told his girlfriend to have fun, and that she didn’t have to feel like she had to constantly check in with him. His girlfriend has had a tough go of it the last several months, so he wanted her to feel free to enjoy herself.
After his girlfriend returned from her trip, she wasn’t acting like herself; however, she’s the kind of girl who gets sad every Sunday, so he thought she was upset about having to get back to her job.
“Then she made a comment on how she ‘can’t believe our luck together, and that surely something was going to happen to mess it up.’ Every alarm in my head went off. I tried to reassure her and play it cool. But man,” he explained.
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
“Two days ago, while she was at the gym, I went through her Facebook to check the group chat from the trip. Sure enough, I found a picture of my GF smiling with some dude.”
“My heart was racing. I also noticed she had blocked the same guy, and there was no conversation history left. I know that might seem like I was overreacting, but something told me I needed to confront her.”
When he came home from the gym, he questioned his girlfriend about the incriminating photo. Initially, she maintained she simply flirted with this man, but her version of events didn’t sound right.
He demanded the truth, and his girlfriend said they had kissed before bursting into tears and ultimately stating that they had slept together.
Everything fell apart for him in that moment. He booked a hotel and left the house. He’s been crying constantly, and while his girlfriend has since told him she will never cheat on him again, he’s left feeling helpless.
“The problem is, I have trouble believing her. We’ve both had issues with infidelity in the past (we cheated on each other at the start of our relationship),” he added.
“We vowed it was done and in the past. The last time it happened, it was also during a trip of hers. I feel like I should forgive this as a stupid mistake, but the fact that it happened on two separate trips feels like a pattern, not a lapse.”
“I don’t want to throw our life together away. I don’t want to find someone else. I thought she was it. But I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to trust her again. Do you guys think our relationship can be saved?”
Well, he said it himself; his girlfriend has made a habit out of cheating on him, and that doesn’t bode well for their future. I’m surprised he was willing to buy a house with this girl, considering her past.
This relationship is definitely over, so I think the best thing to do is call it quits and see if he can buy her out of her portion of the house or vice versa. If not, put it back up for sale.
What advice do you have for him?
You can read the original post below.
By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
