When the people who raised you make it crystal clear that you will always be a second-class citizen to them, should you just cut them out of your life?
This man’s wife is 38, and when she was 5, her dad got remarried. They were a little family for 10 years, until her stepmom got pregnant and had her half-brothers, who are 22 and 25. What’s sad is that his wife was treated like a leper in comparison to her half-brothers.
“Her two half-siblings had a completely different childhood. Private school, paid for college, never worried about a bill, etc.,” he explained.
“Her dad has always treated her differently emotionally as well. No real interest in her life, not supportive when her mom died, keeps her around for appearances. Treats her more like an ex than a daughter.”
Now, his wife’s stepmom comes from a lot of money, and not too long ago, she was granted more access to this cash. He and his wife learned about this from one of her outraged family members.
This loved one revealed to them that his wife’s half-siblings got a million dollars each from her stepmom and were instructed not to tell her about the money.
“This family member was VERY upset on behalf of my wife, especially at her dad. While the money part stings, we get that it comes from [her] stepmom’s family,” he added.
“The hurt is really around the lying and secrecy. Not acknowledging that she has been (and still is) considered outside of their ‘new’ family.”
“We’ve had questions about how certain things have happened in the past and are dismissed: no honesty, no conversation. We feel this solidifies years of different treatment and strains the relationships with everyone, especially her half-siblings.”
He’s not seeing how his wife can move ahead and have a decent relationship with her family after this. He’s left wondering if he and his wife are wrong for no longer wanting to spend time with her family, considering they act like her feelings don’t matter.
He’s not sure if they should address the money with his wife’s family or slowly fade out of their lives.
Ugh, his poor wife! I think it doesn’t hurt for her to send her dad a text saying she knows about the money, and she’s tired of being treated like dirt.
Then, she should block him, her stepmom, and her half-siblings, not wait around for her dad to reply or come up with excuses.
They’re not a loving family, and she will be better off without these people. There is just no use trying to have a relationship with any of them.
What advice do you have for him?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
