She’s Thinking Of Breaking Up With Her Girlfriend Because She Planned Their Wedding The First Week Of Dating And That’s Only One Of The Red Flags
Like many people nowadays, this eighteen-year-old woman met her girlfriend on Tinder about one month ago. They hit it off quickly online, but this woman was nervous that the spark would not be the same in person. Instead, she was happy to be proven wrong.
“She was just as amazing in real life as she was online,” the woman said, “On our first date, we went ice skating and easily made conversation. I was really enjoying my time with her– much more than I had with any of my other dates.”
Their conversation forged beyond surface-level niceties, too. The woman’s date opened up about childhood problems such as abuse, PTSD, and attachment issues.
The woman had no problem with her date’s forwardness and comforted her. But, this sentiment did not last long.
“After the date, I was on cloud nine, but it soon came tumbling down after I realized that she was constantly texting me. I did not think much of it at first, but it soon became every second of the day,” the woman recalled.
It did not matter if the woman told her date she was working. Her date would continuously spam the woman with non-stop text messages until she responded.
This already made her date seem obsessive, but then she took it to the next level.
“On a date, she had seen my schedule for work when I was checking if my manager added any extra shifts. She had memorized my shifts after one look and began messaging me based on when my job started, finished, and when I had breaks,” the woman described.
The pair would not stop talking until one in the morning. Then, at four in the morning, the texts would begin again until the woman woke up.
deagreez – stock.adobe.com – Illustrative purpose only, not the actual person
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The spam-texting was not the only red flag, though. The date even offered to drop any friends that the woman did not like after barely knowing her.
“I thought that was odd as her friends are really nice,” the woman said, “She also gave me access to her online business and told me that, at any time, I could get her to quit. That was her only source of income.”
The woman, again, found the whole exchange to be bizarre. She convinced her date to keep her job and rightfully explained how quitting is her own decision.
After their first date, she also insisted that they meet each other’s parents.
“I said no multiple times, but, in the end, I relented, and we went to the movies with her parents for a second date,” the woman said, “I thought this was weird, but I liked the girl a lot, so I ignored it.”
As if she was not already moving way too fast, the woman’s date finally pushed the woman over the edge when she began planning a wedding.
“My final straw was when, after less than a week of knowing her, she asked me to marry her and started making wedding plans right in front of me,” the woman said, “After a week of all of this, I decided it was enough and that I needed to talk to her.”
The woman told her date that while she did not want to break off their relationship, things were still moving way too quickly. Then, out of the blue, the date began ghosting the woman.
“She would only message me a ‘good morning’ every day, but nothing else, and would not respond to my texts. When I finally got her to respond, she said that she was listening to my wishes in wanting to slow the relationship down,” the woman said.
While this reeks of manipulation, the woman still wanted to make her happy. So, she spent the night at her date’s house to appease her. Still, she did not plan to entertain this relationship much longer.
“By this stage, I was already planning how I was going to break up with her. Part of me didn’t want to let her go, but, in the end, I knew it was for the best,” the woman said.
Since that night, the woman’s date is now planning to move in despite the woman saying no. The cherry on top? The woman does not even have her own place– it is her parent’s house.
While the woman does feel bad for saying “I love you” back after spending the night, she was simply confused– and that’s okay.
“After talking to a lot of friends about the situation, they’ve mentioned that her rushing the relationship and being adamant about moving in with me is because I create an escape from her parents,” the woman explained.
Now, this woman is left wondering if she should sacrifice her boundaries for her date’s wellbeing.
What would you do if you were in this woman’s shoes? Do you think the woman can support her date platonically without escalating the relationship again?
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