She Wants To Move In With Her Boyfriend, But She’s Not Going To If He Makes Her Pay Rent Which Will Go Towards His Mortgage
A 29-year-old girl has a 33-year-old boyfriend whom she has been with for 3 years. He is a homeowner, and he lives there all by himself, so they have chatted about her moving into his place soon.
Living together is the next way to advance their relationship, and they each really want to try living together, but there’s a reason she hasn’t packed her stuff just yet.
Apparently, her boyfriend expects her to pay him rent, but really that money would go right to paying his mortgage on the home that he owns.
“I’m ok helping with utilities, groceries, household items, etc.,” she explained.
“But paying his mortgage is a hard no from me. I just don’t think it makes any sense for me to pay towards his mortgage when I would get nothing from that if we were to break up.”
“His argument is that I would essentially be living with him for free, and it would cause an uneven dynamic in our payment towards shared living expenses.”
While she can sort of see where he’s coming from there, there’s no way around him having an advantage with her paying money towards his mortgage.
Now, her boyfriend’s mortgage payment is what she pays to live where she does now, so if she’s expected to pay half of that, it reduces her overall expenses by a lot.
Although that’s a great perk, she still is unhappy that at the end of the day, she legally does not own the home.
LIGHTFIELD STUDIOS – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purpose only, not the actual person
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And, her boyfriend is not willing to put her on the title to his home if she does pay rent to live there.
“I told him the only way I would pay money for “rent” is if he signs a contract with me stating that any money I pay towards his mortgage will be paid back to me, by him, in the event that we break up,” she said.
“It would also allow me protection from eviction and other basic tenant rights, similar to a rental agreement.”
“He is refusing to sign anything like that because, in his words, I could break up with him for no reason and then take him to court for thousands of dollars.”
The thing is, she never would break up with him out of the blue. So, even though he’s accusing her of being difficult, she thinks he’s not being easy to work with either.
Their disagreement over rent has really divided them, and it doesn’t look like they will be able to figure out a solution soon.
In just 2 months, her lease on her apartment expires, so she does need to figure out her living situation ASAP.
Her landlord is planning to bump her rent payment up if she stays, and if she looks for something else, the rent on other apartments is way higher than what she pays right now.
“But I just don’t feel right contributing money towards his mortgage,” she continued.
“I also know that if I renew my lease, it’s pretty much a dagger to our relationship, which I don’t want because I do love him and see a future with him. I just want to make sure I’m protected.”
“I can tell my BF’s patience on this is wearing thin, and he’s upset with me for digging my heels in on this. But for me, this is about protecting myself for the worst-case scenario while he’s not really risking anything.”
Do you think she should relent on the rent and move in with him?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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