This Mom Is Calling Out Parents Who Need To Be Nicer To Their Teenagers
Parenting is hard. There’s no doubt about that. But what some parents don’t understand, or don’t remember, is that being a teenager is also hard–and justifiably so.
Especially in recent years, there is a lot more that teenagers have to be worried about in school.
And nowadays, mental health has become less of a stigma and has gained significant amounts of support, particularly for children in the high-pressure environment of school.
TikToker @youcancallmekait has picked up on this and is calling out parents who don’t see this struggle that their child is going through.
Her video, aptly titled “Do better,” shows how parents are sometimes over-the-top when reprimanding their teenagers.
“Some of you are absolutely cruel towards your teenagers,” she said. “I saw a video this morning that just broke my mamma heart.”
She explains how this video depicted a teenager who was struggling in school with her attendance but, when yelled at by her mother for slacking off, opened up about her mental health struggles as the root of the problem.
“As her mom is laying into her over text,” Kait says. “She lets her know like, ‘Mom, I’m struggling. I’m not okay, my mental health is not okay, and I’m doing everything that I can do to try to meet your expectations.'”
TikTok; pictured above is Kait in her video
The sad reality is that she feels as though there are certain goals that she must hit in order to please her mother.
She has to do things the right way in her mother’s eyes to be successful.
Meanwhile, she may be severely struggling with her mental health–and opening up about that, being vulnerable even with your own mother, isn’t always the easiest thing to do.
Her mother’s response to her confession wasn’t the best one either. She again shifted the blame onto the daughter for not talking to her enough.
“Why in the world would you expect to be a confidant when you are absolutely mean as s*** to your kid?” Kait asked.
The idea that someone struggling with their mental health might really need help and is denied that opportunity by her own family is appalling, according to Kait.
“Do you know what that leads people to do?” she asked. “If your child comes to you and says, ‘hey, I am hurt, and I am struggling,’ and then they do something to harm themselves, and you have done nothing to help them, that is on you.”
Kait even relates this to her own life and the impossible scenario that she could never imagine ensuing.
“I could not fathom going to my husband or a close friend and being like, ‘hey, my mental health is just wrecked. I need help,’ and then them being like, ‘oh well, if you just get done what you need to get done, it’ll make it better,'” she explained.
She opens up about her views on parenting after an incident like this.
“I am convinced that some people have children just to have control over them,” she said. “And then you have these parents that are shocked when their kids go no contact.”
Maybe there’s a deeper reason why your teenager won’t talk to you. Children won’t want to open up to you if they feel like you won’t be there for them.
“They don’t want a relationship with someone who treats them like s***,” she said.
The bottom line is mental health is a real struggle for many people and shouldn’t be ignored. Listen when someone tells you that they are struggling.
“If you think that the words you are saying don’t carry weight, you are incredibly mistaken,” she said. “Those words become their voice. That becomes how they speak to themselves.”
Kait said it best: “Do better.”
Watch her video here.
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