She Agreed To Remain Friends With Her Ex-Boyfriend After Their Breakup, But Now She Wants To Cut Things Off Because She Thinks Staying In Contact Is Preventing Them Both From Moving On
This 31-year-old woman dated and lived with her ex-boyfriend, who is 37, for two years.
And while they did share some happy memories together, she just couldn’t get over how emotionally immature her ex was. Not to mention, whenever they had any conflicts, their issues never really got resolved.
“So, I eventually got tired of it, and I broke up with him three weeks ago,” she said.
Now, her ex-boyfriend didn’t take the breakup very well. He keeps claiming that he also wanted to split up, but to her, it seems like he was not ready to face the music.
That’s why her ex insisted that they remain friends after they broke up. And even though she wasn’t sure about that being the best idea, she still agreed.
“I’m starting to regret that decision as I don’t think it will help either of us,” she admitted.
Apparently, she is worried that her ex is holding onto hope that he can just keep her around instead of processing the reality of their breakup.
Yes, he has moved out of their place, but he still left a few belongings at her house– claiming they are “for later.”
On top of that, she’s been out of town visiting her family ever since last week. Yet, her ex-boyfriend has reached out to her every single day.
selenit – stock.adobe.com- illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
Just yesterday was no different, and he texted her to ask how things were going. Her ex also detailed what items he planned to take from her place and what he intended to leave behind.
She didn’t want him to leave anything, though, so she asked her ex to take all of his belongings with him. At that point, her ex pointed out how he would prefer to leave some stuff since he doesn’t have anywhere to store all of his belongings yet. But she just told him that she wouldn’t be back for another week– implying that he had a ton of time to find a storage solution.
Anyway, she now feels pretty bad because, on the one hand, she did agree to remain friends with him.
“But it’s only really hitting me now that staying in contact means he won’t process what has happened,” she explained. “And I also want to get over this and move on.”
So, she is considering texting her ex-boyfriend once he has completely moved out and everything is handled to tell him that she wants no contact for at least two months. Then, they could try to hang out afterward.
She is, of course, worried that her text will make her ex extremely upset.
“But I genuinely think it will do us both well,” she vented.
Still, before she goes through with her plan, she’s not sure whether going back on her word and refusing to be friends with her ex anymore would really make her a jerk.
Have you ever remained friends with an ex? Did it help or hurt your healing process? Isn’t she allowed to change her mind? How do you think she should deal with this situation?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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