Here’s How You Can Finally Start To Move On If You’re Still In Love With Your Ex
Breaking up with someone you easily saw yourself having a future with is, honestly, quite traumatizing.
Something that makes breaking up worse is when you break up with someone while you still have feelings for them. Reflecting too much on the past during a time when you’re supposed to be growing and moving on is not helpful and will only leave you stuck in a rut.
If you’ve gone through a breakup recently or a few years ago and think you’re still in love with your ex, here are some tips for moving on and getting past it.
Cut off all contact with them.
I’ve seen so many friends struggle to get through a breakup and get stuck in toxic cycles because they think it would be best to keep in touch with their ex after breaking up with them. However, to truly move on and not be so reliant on your feelings for your ex, you need to stop reaching out to them and cut off contact.
Unless you and your ex have a kid or pet together that you will split custody of after breaking up, you don’t need to be in communication. Don’t try to be “friends” with them; simply let them know you need some time to yourself, which means not being in touch with them.
Don’t ignore your feelings.
One of the worst things you can do to yourself while trying to heal from a breakup, especially a breakup with someone you’re still in love with, is trying to suppress your feelings.
Don’t deny the fact that you’re feeling depressed, angry, lonely, or confused after a breakup, and instead, acknowledge and work through those feelings.
Strelciuc – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
Be realistic about the circumstances.
When we’re missing an ex after a breakup, it’s easy to look back on your relationship with rose-colored glasses and forget about all the reasons why things had to end. Try your best to remind yourself of the reasons why you and your ex broke up. Perhaps they were holding you back, or you two were arguing constantly.
Even if the reasons seem blurry while you grieve your relationship, remember that breaking up for the time being was for the better.
Think about what you can learn from your breakup.
There are always lessons to be learned in these difficult life situations. Instead of reflecting on the past, reflect on everything you’ve learned about yourself since the breakup. Through this experience, you’ve likely learned something new about yourself, how you function in relationships, and the things you need to work on.
Practice self-love.
One of the biggest wake-up calls after ending a relationship is that you have to start loving yourself and stop seeking love from your ex. It’s extremely hard to practice self-love after a breakup, as for a while there, you were getting all the love you needed from someone else. But now, it’s time to take care of yourself.
Self-love isn’t just throwing on a face mask and getting in a bubble bath. Practicing self-love means exploring how you can care for your mind, body, and heart. Avoid talking down to yourself, and show yourself some appreciation for making it this far.
Breakups are one of the most stressful life events human beings can go through, and they’re even harder when you still have feelings for the person you broke up with. However, you will overcome this difficult time with self-love and hard work. Hang in there!
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