The Girl He Was Dating Dumped Him And Said The Feeling Of Love She Had For Him Vanished
Sadly, this 31-year-old man has grappled with abandonment issues throughout his life, which has led to him having poor self-esteem. He often feels inadequate as well.
He feels that everyone has always thrown him out like trash. For instance, his dad abandoned him when he was little, and then when he was 12, he was forced to move away and lost all of his friends.
As an adult, he has had several meaningful relationships with women that have ended over infidelity.
So it’s easy to see why he struggles with feeling as if he’s good enough for other people, even if it’s not in a romantic sense.
He’s done his best to try to overcome his issues; he has gone to therapy, invested hours attempting to improve himself, and even spent a year answering phone calls for a hotline helping people at the lowest points in their lives.
He enjoys being there for those in need, regardless if they are his friends or not. He also only speaks positively about others and doesn’t judge.
“I love with my whole heart and never ask for anything in return from anyone because I really just want to give of myself and make a difference to the people around me,” he explained.
“I have no aspirations to save the world, but if I can make one person a little happier, even for just a moment, I’ll have done my job in this life.”
“Why, then, do people take advantage of my kindness only to discard me after a while? Why do people let me get close, then disappear? Why am I never enough, as I am?”
New Africa – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual people
Not too long ago, he began dating an amazing woman named D, and they have loads in common with one another. They share a lot of similar interests and passions, and things between him and D got very intense quite fast.
He figured his relationship with D was going to be long-lived, and he was ready to commit to her. They never argued and found resolutions to things in a peaceful way.
Several months into dating D, she requested a bit of space from him, and he happily granted that to her.
Then D began speaking to him infrequently and canceling their plans. Yesterday, she invited him over to her place and dumped him. D could not pinpoint a particular reason for wanting to end things between them.
“She said I hadn’t done anything wrong,” he said. “Hadn’t said anything off-putting. That I was thoughtful and caring in every way she wanted. Present. Attentive. Loving.”
“She was adamant that she found me attractive. But that love feeling simply went away for her. It just disappeared. Dissolved into the ether. How could this have happened? I don’t understand. Why am I not enough? Why was I enough yesterday, but now, am no longer?”
“Why is it never enough what I do for others? I just want to feel wanted, to feel loved for who I am, and to give that back. All of these questions are rhetorical, I know there’s no logical answer to why someone who suddenly stop feeling love for another. She understood it was unfair. She was apologetic.”
He didn’t disagree with her, beg her to stay with him, or get mad at her. He simply walked away. That doesn’t make it hurt any less, especially since D did not have a concrete reason for why she no longer wants to be with him.
This has left him feeling inadequate once more and has brought up all of his abandonment issues all over again.
What do you think he can do to feel better?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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