Here Are 5 Reasons You’re Probably Completely And Utterly Scaring Men Off When They Try To Date You
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Yes, some men are easy to scare off and will run at the slightest indication that the relationship is getting serious. However, that does not mean you are entirely blame-free in every situation. You could be doing certain things to run off men without realizing it.
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So, to help you avoid running off every man you date, here are five reasons men get scared off when dating you. This list is not likely to run off all men – as some can handle more than others. However, it is still good to have the information just in case a guy you like happens to be getting cold feet regarding the relationship.
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Reason #1: You make plans for the future WAY TOO SOON.
It can be tricky to gauge how far in the future you can make plans with a new partner. Making plans for the future is always challenging.
I like to abide by a general rule of thumb: never make plans for longer than you’ve been exclusive. So, for example, if you’ve been dating for three months, do not plan anything further into the future than three months.
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I like this rule up to a year – after that, future planning is open season in my book because, at this point, you probably have an idea of where the relationship is headed.
If you have been dating a guy for a week and throw out the idea of him being your plus one at a family wedding six months from now – you are probably scaring him off.
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Reason #2: You talk about your ex, A LOT.
NOBODY likes it when their partner talks about their ex. If you start dating somebody and bring up your ex in every conversation, you are likely scaring off men.
Why? Talking about your ex can potentially mean you are not over them yet. It’s easy for your new guy to think he is a rebound, and he doesn’t want the drama – so he bails.
So if you don’t want to keep losing out on every great guy you meet – limit the ex-talk.
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Reason #3: You introduce him to friends and family too soon.
At the beginning of a relationship, it’s acceptable to spend more time with each other before making introductions to your respective friends and family.
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However, suppose you’ve been dating for only a couple of weeks, and you already want to bring him to a family reunion, a funeral, a wedding, or an intimate friend group party. In that case, he might feel things are moving too fast and end things.
Guys do not want to feel like they are being rushed to marriage or even just a serious relationship too fast – this will scare them off.
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Reason #4: You show up uninvited.
This is a big no-no in early dating. Guys like their space and their privacy. You showing up uninvited violates both and will be a major red flag in his eyes.
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So if he says he has a guy’s night at his place, do not just show up unless he specifically invited you.
If you make a habit of showing up at his work, house, or favorite hangouts to see him without asking – you only have yourself to blame when he tells you it’s over – and ghosts you completely.
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Reason #5: You act too sensitive.
I’m not saying you are not entitled to your feelings – but men tend to rag on each other. When your guy does this with you, he is either trying to gauge your sensitivity level or demonstrate he likes you by treating you the way he treats everyone else he likes.
If you can’t meet him halfway, you’ll scare him off. If he isn’t crossing any boundaries with comments and jokes, lighten up a little, or he’s going to run off and find someone who can take a joke better than you.
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Honorable mentions
Since there are more than five reasons you could be scaring men off, here are some other reasons:
-You are too needy
-You are too bossy
-You are too available
-You act jealous
-You are overly dramatic
-You talk to him too much
-You don’t talk to him enough
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Yes, there are some contradictions here – because there is a sweet spot for you to find—for example, some men like women who are a little needy because it feeds their hero instinct. However, if she is too needy, it’s like having a child, which will scare him off.
You have to find the sweet spot to avoid scaring off guys.
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