Rebecca Meyer
This man, who is in his 40s, has a 34-year-old brother. This brother is the second-youngest sibling in his family. During a family gathering six years ago, his brother had a meltdown and declared that their entire family was “dead to him.”
Afterward, his brother left and returned to his home in Texas, on the opposite side of the country. His brother hasn’t communicated with him or the rest of the family since.
“Why are we dead to him? I told a story about a college friend of mine whom he had met and how that college friend was reunited with his long-lost sister. This brother of mine has astounding control issues,” he said.
Over the years, his brother has constantly had meltdowns when people have information he isn’t aware of. His brother was fairly close with the friend from college who’d gotten back in contact with his sister, and they often grabbed lunch together.
But his brother hadn’t seen this friend in five years. His brother was angry that he hadn’t known this information, and as he had a tantrum, he claimed their family was keeping secrets about family friends from him. He and his family tried to calm his brother down, but it didn’t work. His brother got a cab and left.
Later, he and his family blocked his brother on social media but didn’t block his phone number. They wanted him to have a way to reach them if he decided he was ready to talk to them again, but he’d have to either text or call them. Now, he doesn’t feel like he’d be interested in mending his relationship with his brother if his brother was open to it one day.
“I have had enough of his constant attitude, whatever untreated mental disorder he has. It’s his responsibility to deal with it. I spent 20 years encouraging him to get help, including offering to pay for it and provide logistics for it,” he explained.
Because he didn’t want his brother to experience the same hardships he did, he paid his college tuition and gave him vehicles. His family put up with his brother’s controlling, manipulative, and deceptive behavior for years. Unfortunately, his brother also stole from people, frequently lied, and regularly started family conflicts.
“On the anniversary of this, every year, I host a big dinner at my home and invite the family. Each year, I have a cake with something like ‘You’re dead to me now’ written on it, usually surrounded by joyful-looking cake art,” he shared.
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