Her Husband Sent Flirty Messages To His Assistant And Then Deleted Them
How would you feel if your partner was crossing boundaries with someone at their office? Two weeks ago, this 28-year-old woman was in the car with her 33-year-old husband and his mom after driving home from having lunch with her husband’s sister-in-law.
Her husband was the one driving that day, and she had to check his mom in for a flight. She picked up her husband’s phone and opened up his text messages since his mom’s boarding pass was in there.
As she looked through the messages, she caught her husband sending tons of messages back and forth with his female assistant, but their exchange was not professional in nature. The messages were full of emojis, and the last message talked about cocktails.
“My heart dropped. I quickly skimmed through the texts while he was driving to see frequent conversations, many he initiated, but no…frank cheating,” she explained.
“Mainly flirting and emojis. I brushed it off at first, especially since my husband and I work together (think same company but not close enough that [his] assistant knows of my existence, like different floors? but many other coworkers know we are married).”
She once again went back through his phone to grab evidence of the messages, and she admits it was not good of her to invade her husband’s privacy like that, but she wanted confirmation.
The second time going through his phone, she saw even more messages between her husband and his assistant.
Again, these messages were incredibly flirtatious, and they both indicated that they were excited to see the other person.
What hit her the hardest was realizing that her husband was telling his assistant about what he was doing, but he left her out of it and acted like she didn’t exist.
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“For example, we were out on date night, and he was showing me something on his phone, and she texted,” she added.
“He liked it and brushed it off, saying it was a continuation of a work conversation. Looking at his texts, the next day he just said, “Sorry, I was out.” And continued to talk about alcohol preferences, things to do while out.”
“Today, I checked his phone again (again, I am imperfect I know this) only to find he had deleted many of the texts with her. This was a blow even more because the whole time I was unsure if the texting crossed the firm line of cheating. But having him delete messages seems to be an admission of guilt?”
She’s terrified to ask their mutual friends at work if they noticed her husband being out of line with his assistant in the office.
She would hate for that to impact her job, or her husband’s, and she doesn’t believe in dragging personal topics into a professional setting.
She feels like her husband cheated on her after considering all of those messages he sent to his assistant, and she’s having a difficult time understanding what she should do.
“But how am I supposed to tell our friends, our co-workers, our families, and my stepdaughter that I am leaving because my husband was texting a girl?” she wondered.
“I am feeling so torn, and sadly, we are at least at the same place of work for the next year due to contracts. How do I proceed?”
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