If someone shows you disrespect on a first date, are you supposed to sit there politely and endure it, or are you allowed to walk away the second the red flags show up?
That’s the question she was faced with after a handshake turned into an insult, and a lunch date turned into a man telling her who she should be.
This woman is in her late 30s, and met a guy online who’s around her same age. They texted a lot prior to meeting up in real life for their first date.
As they chatted, they both said they view themselves as romantic and cuddly, and it’s always nice to know someone’s love language up front, right?
She honestly does love cuddling with guys she’s crushing on, so it’s not like that was a lie. Their first date happened today, and right before she went to see him, she texted him to state that she doesn’t like to hug guys when she first meets them.
Instead, she offered to shake his hand and say hello, as she feels more at ease with that kind of initial contact.
When she did come face-to-face with him, she thought he had a slight attitude, but she tried to overlook it. She figured the date would go great regardless of his not liking her handshake.
“We order a sandwich each, and he backs away from the register so he doesn’t have to pay for mine. That’s okay. It was a little embarrassing, though,” she explained.
“Anyway, the first thing he tells me is that he is surprised I call myself a cuddly person since I didn’t want to hug him, he wonders if I have dated many men before, says I’m a reserved person, and that it’s the first time a woman doesn’t want to hug him on a first date.”
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“He then calls me a prude. That made me upset, and he tried to convince me that prude is not a negative word, and I feel it’s negative because I have [had a] negative experience [with] the word. I got so annoyed that I showed him the definition of prude in the dictionary. He still didn’t agree that it’s an insult. I then ended the date.”
She felt unsafe since their exchange was so heated. The date lasted 30 minutes in total before she walked out. She’s still in shock that he was so rude to her, and she can’t believe he called her a prude.
Not only did he ruin the date, but he did her a favor, because the last thing she needs is a man who thinks that calling someone a prude is somehow charming banter.
She was right to walk out, and she doesn’t need to second-guess herself for a second. Men like that don’t get better with time; they just get bolder with disrespect. Better to learn it in 30 minutes than in 30 days.
What do you think of her date?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
