Childhood bullying can stay with you forever. Some of the last damage can include scars or questions you never get real answers to.
But he just learned that the girl who tormented him for more than a decade wasn’t just a random mean kid; she’s his biological sister.
And now his parents expect him to sit in therapy with the person who made his life miserable, all because they kept a secret. He’s not trying to be cruel; he’s just trying to protect himself for once, which is something his parents never did for him.
This 17-year-old guy had a childhood bully who started terrorizing him back when he was only in kindergarten. His bully was a girl, two years his senior, and he couldn’t figure out why she had such a deep-seated hatred for him.
Well, he didn’t know it then, but she did have a reason. She said horrific things to him, tripped and pushed him, and threw her lunches all over him.
His parents never stuck up for him and acted hesitant to get involved, which he found confusing. They actually told him this girl had to be in some kind of emotional pain, and he shouldn’t do anything to get her in trouble.
“Even when I came home with bruises, their response was the same. A few times, I begged them to help me make it stop, and they told me they would speak to my teachers, and they did, but I don’t think they actually ever said anything to make it stop,” he explained.
“Once a month, I would spend a weekend with my grandparents as a kid. My parents would ‘visit friends,’ and they said it was kid-free time, so I got grandma and grandpa time.”
“My grandparents would act so weird about the whole thing, too, and they were always unhappy with my parents and the time they spent with ‘friends,’ but I also felt like my grandparents weren’t too happy about me being there.”
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Then his parents stopped visiting friends and started having secret phone calls. They would make him go outside for hours on end or tell him to spend time with his friends.
He attempted to eavesdrop multiple times, but his parents would ensure he was out of the house before getting on the phone with whoever was on the other end of the line.
As for his childhood bully, she didn’t let up and even told him she was going to save her cash to hire an older guy to beat him up. Then, she brought up his parents.
He couldn’t figure out the connection and how this girl seemingly knew his mom and dad. Not only that, but she obviously hated his parents as much as him.
He attempted to ask his parents and grandparents about the strange coincidence, but they evaded his questions.
“Then she graduated, and she left town for several months, and I didn’t see her, and I was happier, but my parents acted like they were having the worst time ever,” he added.
“Then she moved back to town and in with her parents, and that’s when my parents told me that she was their bio kid and they had an open adoption of her, so they would see her once a month, and then later it was phone calls.”
“She knew about me, and the reason we never met as siblings or bio family is that she resented me from a young age, so they kept us separate. She was angry that she was given up for adoption, but now wanted a relationship with my parents. But she still hated me. My parents had her come to our house, and she told me she hated me and still wished I would just die.”
Several months later, when his childhood bully/sister was still acting like she couldn’t stand him, his parents demanded that they all go to family therapy together.
Initially, his childhood bully/sister balked at that, but agreed. As for him, he has no interest in attending therapy with this awful girl, even after finding out that they’re related.
He doesn’t want to form a bond with her. He asked if he could go to therapy alone, but his parents told him no; his only option is to go to family therapy with all of them.
“My parents are angry that I won’t try. They said she’s been dealing with abandonment issues and jealousy issues her whole life, and my grandparents rejected her, so she’s got more trauma than I can comprehend, and they told me I need to try because we are a family, and she’s my sister,” he continued.
“My grandparents won’t talk to me about it, and they act like they’re angry at me, too, but there doesn’t seem to be a reason other than they maybe didn’t like that my parents had me young, too. My parents were 16 when they had her and 18 when they had me.”
He’s so upset about everything. He has to see his childhood bully/sister way more now than he wants to, and his parents are badgering him nonstop about therapy and giving this girl a chance to be in his life in a meaningful way.
He’s angry at his mom and dad for spending his whole life ignoring the relentless bullying he faced, all because they gave up their child and were guilty about it. But they never felt bad about him being bullied.
He’s left wondering if he’s a jerk for not wanting to try family therapy with his childhood bully/sister.
This is just awful. This poor guy! His parents are actually the worst for subjecting him to abuse, failing to protect him, and then trying to force him to have a relationship with his sister after all of the horrible things she did to him.
His parents are failures, and he should hurry up and move out of his house as soon as he’s able to, before cutting contact with all of them.
What do you think?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
