If you were vehemently opposed to living with your partner’s mom, but they felt you should be willing to move in with them all and play one big happy family, what would you do?
This 24-year-old girl has a 27-year-old boyfriend, and he’s currently furious with her for not wanting to move in with him. While he does own his own 3-bedroom 2-bathroom house, his mom is his roommate, and he rents out the basement. Her boyfriend has four older siblings, and his parents are divorced.
“His mom is 63, does not drive, and does not speak English; therefore, a lot of her needs fall on everyone else, which I’m aware at some point will happen to anyone,” she explained.
“My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 1/2 years. From the very start, I have always made it known that I would not move in with a man and his parents. It’s a simple boundary that I’ve had and will stick to.”
As soon as her boyfriend purchased his house in December of 2024, his sister said they could find an alternative living situation for his mom, but her boyfriend wasn’t sure if he was that serious about her, so he kept on living with his mom.
Recently, she questioned her boyfriend about his plan for their future, which upset him. She has routinely asked him this throughout the course of their relationship because she wants answers, which her boyfriend never gives.
“He says that he’s human and really stressed himself out over this idea, which I know is probably very difficult because he can’t really just kick his mom out,” she added.
“I think that he’s been put into a very difficult situation. And I don’t think that he’s wrong for not wanting to have his mom move elsewhere, and I also don’t think that I am wrong for wanting my own space with my partner.”
Considering she’s not willing to move in with him and his mom, he’s beside himself while accusing her of being unsupportive. Her boyfriend says a real girlfriend would be willing to live with him.
Sign up for Chip Chick’s newsletter and get stories like this delivered to your inbox.
She’s just not comfortable making his mom her roommate. It’s not that she doesn’t like her; it’s just her personal preference. She feels stuck, and she’s not sure what the path forward looks like.
She’s left wondering if she should reconsider living with his mom, or if it’s acceptable for her to want her own space with her boyfriend.
There really are only two solutions here: she can cave and agree to move in with her boyfriend and his mom, or she can break up with her boyfriend over the impasse.
She is right that they are both entitled to their own boundaries on their living situations, but they’re coming up on five years together with no resolution in sight, so I think they’re just incompatible at this rate.
What advice do you have for her?
You can read the original post below.
By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
