It’s so insane to me when a mom is capable of abandoning her child and moving on with her life. How would you feel if your mom walked out on you when you were only in kindergarten, and then had her sister tell your dad that she misses you years later?
This 23-year-old girl went to lunch with her 71-year-old dad yesterday, and they began talking about her mom. Her mom was a stay-at-home mom, and her dad was the one who supported their family when she was little.
“For context, my mom is Thai, and my dad is Italian. He met her on a work trip, she moved to Italy, and he spent a lot of money on her, including buying houses under her name,” she explained.
“When she left (I was 5), she took a large amount of money from him. Granted, all of this has been told to me by my dad, so the narrative could be biased.”
“When I found out about it, I was pretty numb. She had actually told me she was leaving the night before, but when I started crying, she told me she was joking. I vividly remember my dad coming to pick me up from kindergarten with a stressed expression, telling me, ‘Mom has left,’ and me responding, ‘I know,’ with a deadpan face.”
Her life fell apart after that. She is still trying to heal from what her mom did to her. She has commitment and trust issues due to her abandonment, and she was diagnosed later on with anxiety and clinical depression.
She has also been living with her dad’s sister, as her dad has to travel so much for his job. Back when she turned 18, her mom’s sister reached out to her dad to say her mom misses her and would like to get back together with her dad, too!
Her dad did promise to speak to her and see what she wanted to do. Next, her dad spoke to her aunt’s husband, who said that her mom was married to another man, as they had gone to the wedding two years earlier.
“When my dad told me about all of this, we agreed that it was ridiculous and that she was probably after more money. I told him I didn’t want to meet her because I felt like I had nothing to tell her,” she added.
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“A few months ago, I found my aunt’s Facebook and eventually found my mom. I barely recognized her because she has gotten plastic surgery.”
“Sometimes I check on her profile, where I see her post pictures in an influencer-style, with expensive bags and clothes, seemingly enjoying her life. She doesn’t seem to have other children.”
So at lunch with her dad yesterday, she admitted that she often considers reaching out to her mom, because she’s curious. Her dad was vehemently opposed to this and said her mom deserves to never hear from her again for abandoning her.
Her dad wants her to let her mom live with her remorse and thinks that if she does message her mom, it lets her mom win. She does get why her dad feels like this, but she doesn’t think her mom has any regret for her actions.
There is a piece of her that wonders if talking to her mom will grant her closure or some sort of epiphany, though she doubts much would be different.
She really would just ask her mom if she’s doing alright and if she has a partner. Her dad ended their conversation by saying she is free to do what she wishes, but he wants her to ignore her mom.
She’s left wondering if she would be a jerk for making contact with her mom.
I’m on her dad’s side because I don’t think anything good will come of talking to her mom; it will only set her up to be further hurt by this woman.
What could her mom possibly say or do to make up for abandoning her? The answer is nothing, and that’s why I believe she has to keep her mom out of her life, as her dad recommended.
She has to protect herself above all else.
What do you think?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
