If you allowed the person you were dating to move in with you, only to have things get ugly within 60 days, would you be making them move out?
Two months ago, this 29-year-old man’s 28-year-old girlfriend, Amy, moved in with him, and to say things are not going well is the understatement of the year.
After Amy moved in, they started arguing about the division of household chores, and those fights escalated more than they should have.
He and Amy have been off and on for the last four years, and she initially moved in with him so they could save money and use that to buy a house.
“I pay about 80-85% of the bills granted. I bring in more, so [it] makes more sense. She put her home up for rent so that it can pay the mortgage on its own and use that money that she would be using towards her mortgage out of her check to get out of debt,” he explained.
“She does about 80-85% of the house chores since she is usually home before I am, but I’m always helping out where needed once I’m home and ask if there is anything she needs help with.”
“Whenever we have gotten into arguments in the past, she has gotten disrespectful, like insults, name-calling, and bringing up things that were told in confidence as a way to bring me down. I’m a very non-confrontational person.”
Also, Amy has gotten slightly physical with him before, but he knows better than to act like that. When Amy escalates, he walks away, calms down, and then comes back. He doesn’t like to put anyone down or scream when arguing.
He especially hates using something that was said privately as a weapon, so he asked Amy not to do that, and they agreed on that as a rule for future fighting.
“Today she insinuated that we should see other people, said some things about being stupid and only using the relationship while she got her home back, [and] called me a bad father to my son from a previous relationship,” he continued.
“I have him about 4 days on average [in a] week. His mom and I have a cordial coparent relationship. [I] never miss an important moment [with him], [we] spend plenty of time together, [and] her reason, however, was because occasionally, [he and I] go to bed a little past 10 p.m. (he is 5).”
“She wants to stay living with me in separate rooms, doing our own thing, while her home lease is up with her tenant in a year. The house is a small 2-bedroom 1-bath. I told her there was no way, and she would have to move out because we don’t mix well living together.”
He’s left wondering if he’s a jerk for making Amy move out only two months after she moved in to his place.
It’s scary that Amy puts her hands on him and argues like that. He needs to get her out of his house ASAP, and since she wants to see other people, guess what, now she’s welcome to do that.
He should absolutely not buy a house with her or keep dating her after how she’s behaved.
What do you think?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
