His Girlfriend’s Friends Always Expect Him To Pay For Them When They Hang Out And He’s Asking The Internet If He’s A Jerk For Refusing To Do This Going Forward
A 24-year-old man has been dating his 24-year-old girlfriend Bridget for 3 years now.
They purchased a home together, which they both live in, and he thinks that he certainly has been generous to his girlfriend throughout the years they have been together.
“I don’t know when I became the ATM of the group,” he said, and that’s the biggest problem in his relationship.
“What I didn’t expect was to become the sole footer of the bill when Bridget, myself, and her 3,4, or sometimes 5 friends go out.”
“What happens is, one of us pitches going out, and about 50% of the time it’s date night, just us two, 50% she texts these friends and it becomes a group event.”
“What can also happen is date night turns into a bar hop which becomes us meeting up with her friends.”
Bridget’s friends always end up ordering more expensive things on the menu when they all go out, for example, they mist recently ordered $14 glasses of wine.
A week ago when they all went out, the tab was $667 for their dinner and drinks.
At that point, he was done. He explained to Bridget that after that evening, he was only going to be footing the bill for himself and her.
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It was time for Bridget’s friends to pay their own way from now on.
“Bridget feels as though I’m being unwelcoming to her friends and worries that if she tells them that their food and drinks are on them, that they’ll resent her for it,” he continued.
He’s wondering if he really is a jerk for not wanting to pay for all of her freeloader friends anymore
Here’s what the internet had to say.
“You’re the sugar daddy for the group. Your girl is using you.”
“But dump her. They know what they’re doing. You were just identified as a pushover nice guy who wouldn’t have the confidence to stand up to them and tell them to pay for themselves.”
“DUMP HER. This woman will bleed you dry and rinse your corpse. You pay for everything, don’t you? And I’m willing to bet have literally no savings.”
“If you need assurance she’s not for you- tell her you just got fired and need her to cover the bills this month. See what happens.”
“Mate, you need to listen to this woman! If your girl is inviting her friends out on your couples date night then it sounds like she’s not invested in the relationship.”
“She could see them any night so why date night? This might sound mean but personally, I’d test the group.”
“Arrange a night out with them all but then you pull out. See if they all still go out, that could tell you a lot about them all. Also, what do her friends do for jobs? Could they afford to pay for themselves?”
“Bridget is treating you like an ATM. If she wants her friends to feel welcome, she can pay for them.”
“Take a long, hard look at your relationship. It sounds like she is taking advantage of you. Do you really feel loved? Respected? Important?”
“No offense but are you sure you want to be involved in the relationship?! It sounds as though she cares more about her friends than your relationship.”
“She uses date night as an excuse to hang out with her friends and instantly assumes you will happily pay for everyone.”
“Now that you have mentioned not doing it, she is more concerned with what her friends will think of her.”
“If you want to really test the relationship, ask her to pay the bills for her friends from now on and see what happens (Spoiler: She will break up with you)!”
“It sounds like the only reason Bridget’s friends like to hang out with her is because you foot the bill for their free night on the town.”
“It’s not Bridget’s money her friends are spending. It’s time to cut off the freeloaders.”
You can read the rest of what the internet had to say here.
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