She Told Her Friend That She Was Not Going To Be Her Maid Of Honor Before Saying She Needed To Make New Friends

MaxFrost - stock.adobe.com
MaxFrost - stock.adobe.com

Have you ever felt emotionally drained by a very dependent friend? This woman did, too. That’s why she finally told her ex-friend that she needed to meet new people– and that she would not be at her wedding.

“I’ve known my friend, let’s call her Beth, since high school. We were very good friends but, after graduating high school, she started studying and I was working,” the woman explained.

As time passed by after graduation, the woman would see Beth a few times a year. But, their friendship was nowhere near like it was in high school.

“Beth has always struggled with depression and anxiety. She was always feeling down and had trouble making friends,” the woman said.

“I tried to support her as much as I could, but my own mental health went downhill.”

At this time, the woman also noticed that Beth never bothered to ask how she was doing. Instead, Beth’s own anxiety was always the topic of conversation.

This is when the woman finally decided to stop seeing Beth as often and call it a day… until things took a turn.

“Last year, she met her boyfriend from the United States who is five years younger. We are from Europe,” the woman recalled.

“Last Christmas, she went there to meet him in real life. He is only nineteen, doesn’t work nor go to college, and also still lives with his parents.”

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Despite all of these red flags, Beth still saw no issue. The pair quickly became engaged and are now planning a wedding for this summer.

“Beth is currently back in Europe now, and we recently met to catch up. She talked about her wedding and– out of the blue– she asked me to be the maid of honor,” the woman said, “I was a little overwhelmed and said no. I don’t have the time nor energy to plan her wedding.”

Beth did not take the hint, though. She then asked the woman to be a bridesmaid instead. In the woman’s home country, a bridesmaid is the equivalent of an American “flower girl.”

Understandably, the woman was confused until she realized Beth was getting married in the United States.

Beth said that she would pay for the plane tickets and that the woman would have free boarding at her fiancé’s house. While this is basically a paid vacation, the woman was still not interested.

“I already planned my paid weeks off at work and, if I want to get another week, it would be taken off of my salary,” the woman explained.

“And, honestly, I just don’t feel close enough with her anymore to be there. I didn’t tell her that, but I did tell her that I wouldn’t be attending her wedding at all.”

Beth was shocked and upset with the woman. She claimed that the woman was her only friend and used her social life as a guilt trip.

“I told her that now was her time to finally start learning how to make friends there because I am not planning to move to the United States with her. She got angry with me and left,” the woman said.

Now, the woman is wondering if she overreacted. Some of her friends and family agree that Beth was “acting ridiculous.”

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Others, like her mom, think that she should have just gone to the wedding since it would have only cost a bit of time and salary.

What would you have done in this woman’s situation? Would you have gone to the wedding as a regular guest or cut this friend off once and for all?

To read the entire Reddit thread, click here.

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Katharina Buczek graduated from Stony Brook University with a degree in Journalism and a minor in Digital Arts. Specializing ... More about Katharina Buczek

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