Katharina Buczek
Then, once you feel like you are in a solid mental state, you can jump back into the dating pool– and for the right reasons this time.
2. Pickiness
Okay, we would all probably love it if our childhood heartthrob rode into town, confessed his love, and swept us away to live in a gorgeous home with everything we could ever possibly need. But that’s a fantasy that will never happen for 99.99% of us.
So, what is a girl to do? Well, for starters, lower your expectations.
I am not saying to set the bar too low. I mean, men still shouldn’t deserve us if they do the literal bare minimum. But we do have to strike a balance and find that “happy medium.”
On social media and TV, we are constantly shown curated, hyper-perfect people who appear to “have it all.” We have been fed impractical romance plotlines that have pushed us to “hype up” love and relationships to a point that is just not realistic.
For instance, is a “spark” really the main indicator that we should continue in a relationship? Probably not. Yet, so many people ditch potential partners after a first date if there is not enough intensity or romantic tension.
The idea of “not settling” has also been seriously glamorized in modern society. And I get it: women should not accept anything less than they deserve. But, sometimes, superficiality invades this idea and causes women to write off guys left and right who have real flaws like the rest of us.
So, while it is completely okay– and honestly a good thing– to have standards, it is also important to have a bit of flexibility. Remember that literally no one is perfect, including you, which means that your real “dream guy” will also have his own downfalls.
In order to figure out your own standards and make sure they are realistic, you can start by writing out a list of non-negotiables. Maybe your list will include certain moral values or life goals. But what your list probably shouldn’t include is the way your dream guy dresses, how much money he makes, or if he has a six-pack.
At the end of the day, you can think about how you would want to be assessed by a potential partner. If you wouldn’t want someone to disregard you because of your wardrobe or haircut, don’t do the same.
