These Three Dating Downfalls Might Be Keeping You Single: Let’s Fix Them

3. Your Fears Are Tripping You Up

In order to protect ourselves, we all have self-ingrained filter systems. These systems help us analyze situations and understand where we stand in relation to other people. They are also usually fueled by fears or threats.

For instance, if your biggest fear is rejection, you may be on the lookout for it everywhere you go. Are your friends including you in hangouts? Do your coworkers genuinely sound interested in what you have to say? Are your dates coming onto you hard enough?

But, this filter system can sometimes feed a self-fulfilling prophecy that is seriously damaging.

If you are constantly afraid of being rejected, for example, you may not even be able to realize when people are doing the opposite. Instead, you might just focus on the one person who has rejected you in spite of all the other potential suitors who are ready and waiting to move forward with you.

So, in order to start seeing the good around you instead of catastrophizing your own love life, you have to remain grounded. Stop letting your subconscious thoughts win and tune into what’s really going on. Recognize and acknowledge when people are interested or show care, and say to hell with the rest.

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