She’s Feeling Very Uneasy After Discovering A Folder In Her Husband’s Filing Cabinet Containing Documentation Of Their Arguments, Her Financial Records, Her Driver’s License, And Her Social Security Number
This 34-year-old woman has been with her husband, who is 33, for four years. But, their relationship had a pretty tumultuous start.
Her husband is Dutch, and when they first started dating, she found out he had four girlfriends in Holland after six months of being together.
At that point, she cut off their relationship and stopped communicating with him. But, her husband was persistent– sending her flowers every day for weeks and even flying to the United States to show up on her doorstep.
So, she eventually took him back and fell in love with him all over again. However, she claimed the only way she would ever be able to trust her now-husband was if he moved to the U.S.
He agreed to move, too, and since then, their relationship has not been all sunshine and rainbows.
However, ever since they had a daughter together, she claimed to have seen a “huge change” in her husband.
“He seems invested and devoted to only me and her and acknowledges what a [mess] he was,” she said.
But more recently, she found something in their home that has reignited feelings of worry.
It all began when the breakers in their home started shutting off. At that point, she remembered how her husband had documents from their electrician related to their warranty.
Pixel-Shot – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
She also knew her husband had kept all of the trade contacts from when they built their home in a folder in his files.
So, she opened up his file cabinet in search of the electrician’s contact information but wound up stumbling upon a folder that had her name on it instead.
She was obviously intrigued and curious about what could have been in there, too, which was why she opened it up. But she could not believe what she found.
Inside, her husband had documentation of all of their arguments and fights. Plus, he also had all of her financial records– including her W2 forms, paystubs, tax returns, bank statements, and real estate contracts– as well as copies of her driver’s license and social security card!
This was immediately alarming to her, and she confronted her husband with everything she found.
However, her husband just claimed the information was for “self-protection” in the event they ever got divorced.
“I feel betrayed,” she admitted.
Now, she does earn a lot of money in her current job; meanwhile, her husband is self-employed. And since they live in a community property state, he would be entitled to half of her assets– which she is honestly fine with.
However, what upsets her is how it seems like her husband is calculating and planning for the end of their marriage.
Her husband, on the other hand, has a different perspective. To him, the file represents self-protection.
“It’s not to actively go after me, but if I tried to divorce him or kick him out, he wants to document things I’ve done,” she explained.
Apparently, this makes her husband feel safer since he is an immigrant living in the U.S., and he claimed that he just wanted to feel secure in the event they ever got divorced.
Despite her husband’s reasoning, though, she hasn’t been able to move past the file she discovered.
“I feel uneasy about this now and am not sure how to proceed,” she vented.
So now, she’s been left wondering whether she should accept her husband’s reasoning at face value or push the conversation further.
How would you feel if you found a file like that in your spouse’s file cabinet? Is it reasonable that her husband wants to protect himself in the event of a divorce? Or do you think the file is over the line? How would you handle this?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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