She’s Making Her Son Cook Dinner For Their Family Once A Week Since She Thinks This Is A Skill He Needs To Learn, But Her Own Mom Screamed At Her For Punishing Him
This 43-year-old woman has two teen sons: 15-year-old James and 17-year-old Adam. Ever since he was little, Adam has always liked to cook, and he’s actually quite good at it.
Adam is the one who makes dinner for their entire family two or three times every single week since he enjoys it that much.
Adam also loves trying out new recipes, and so making dinner for everyone gives him the ability to do that.
She’s the one who cooks dinner on the nights that Adam does not, but over the summer, her husband likes to grill basically every single night.
Now, James has never shown any interest in cooking, although she has attempted to teach him the basics in the kitchen.
James is fully capable of putting together a sandwich for himself, but he’s the kind of person who would rather reach for a piece of fruit than make a meal.
“A few months back, James began asking Adam in the afternoons to make him a snack (something homemade), and sometimes he’ll do it if he’s in the mood, but more often than not, he’s bothered by the daily requests,” she explained.
“I asked James why he can’t make a sandwich or have a snack (we always have things like hummus, yogurt, pita, sliced veggies, salsa, and chips; I make baked goods often…a good array of decent snacks).”
“He could make a smoothie, there’s always frozen fruit. But he said Adam is just better at it, and he doesn’t know how to make it as good. I felt this was a sign I had dropped the ball, so I decided that James would take over making the family dinner once a week.”
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She let James know that he did not have to cook anything elaborate or over the top and that if he just put something decent together, that would be great.
Yesterday evening, James made the family grilled cheeses, and he also put together tomato soup, salad, and some sliced-up strawberries. This dinner was pretty basic, but it was great. She also doesn’t mind if James relies on packaged soups to help him whip up dinner.
She does step in to assist James with planning dinners in advance, and she sits at the dining room table and does work while James is in the kitchen, so she’s close by in case he needs any kind of help.
“He hasn’t enjoyed this, but I’ve still kept on it because it’s a really important life skill. Feeding yourself isn’t optional,” she said.
“He’s been complaining to my mother (his grandma), and she’s been calling me to tell me I’ve let a “punishment” go on too long. But it’s not meant to be that, it’s life skill training, and I was very clear with James that this was a permanent change, not a temporary punishment.”
“But she made me feel like an absolutely terrible mother forcing “unpleasant chores“ on my children. I tried to point out that my own brother is a grown man who lives on takeout because she never taught him to cook, and I didn’t want that to be James one day.”
Her mom actually hung up the phone after she said that. Her husband supports her expecting James to make dinner for them once a week, but being screamed at by her mom really made her feel awful. She’s left wondering if it really is super mean of her to make James keep making dinner once a week.
What do you think?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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