This 36-year-old woman has a husband the same age as her, and one day, her husband announced that he was going to start cooking for them.
She has no clue why her husband just took this upon himself since he never used to cook, but that never bothered her to have to make their food, as she adores cooking.
Initially, she thought it would be lovely for her husband to make their meals, and she was happy he wanted to contribute more to their relationship. Sadly, her excitement quickly died because her husband is awful in the kitchen.
“At first, I would hang out in the kitchen and try to guide him, but he gets upset when he feels like I am correcting him and refuses to do what I suggest,” she explained.
“If I don’t say anything, but I see food starting to burn because a pan is on way too high, and I just get up to turn it down, he gets upset and says “please just let me do it.” I will point out that he didn’t even notice the pan burning so how long was I supposed to let it happen before “letting him do it?”
“At a certain point, I had to stop hanging out in the kitchen while he cooks, because I can’t just sit there and let him do everything wrong without saying anything. I’m not good at too many things, but I’m a really good cook, and I have a lot of experience, so I’m not sure why he doesn’t want my help.”
So, she no longer helps and instead excuses herself to another room in their home while her husband spends an hour or two struggling in the kitchen.
It stresses her out to have to listen to her husband slamming all of her really nice kitchen things while screaming at the same time from frustration.
Frequently, the dishes her husband whips up are not even edible, and she promises she’s not picky.
Also, her husband will mostly trash what he makes, and she is upset that he’s being so wasteful, especially since food costs so much right now.
“He always says he will clean up afterward, but I will see all my expensive cooking utensils and dishes and pans piled carelessly in the sink, and it makes me nervous that he is going to break or chip something,” she said.
“Cooking is one of my favorite hobbies, and I have a lot of nice kitchen stuff that I have been slowly collecting for many years. My collection of cooking tools is really important to me, and I have been slowly building it for over 15 years since I started living on my own. I don’t feel like he is as careful with my things as I would be.”
“So I always rush to finish eating (not hard since I usually only choke down a few bites out of politeness) so I can be the first one in the kitchen to clean my stuff. This upsets him, and he insists that he is perfectly capable of doing cleaning. I point out that the rest of the kitchen is an absolute disaster (food and sauces and garbage all over the counters and floor), and he can start tackling that, and again he will get upset, pick up a few things, and then leave and go watch TV.”
She then ends up being the one who has to clean absolutely everything up, and it’s not easy because her husband is talented at making colossal messes.
She’s exhausted from having to be his maid, and on top of it, they have pets, so she has to triple-check the floors to make sure their pets don’t get into any of the mess her husband leaves behind.
If she does decide to tell her husband she wants him to quit cooking, she thinks he’s not going to receive that well.
“But I can’t keep doing this, so I’m hoping to get some advice for how I can bring this up,” she continued. “I’m also open to suggestions for how to at least help my husband be more comfortable with me helping him so he can learn.”
What advice do you have for her?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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