She’s Considering Refusing To Go To Her Ex-Boyfriend’s Spontaneously-Planned Wedding Because He Expected Her To Provide And Serve The Food, As Well As Clean Up The Event

javiindy - stock.adobe.com -  illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
javiindy - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

Have you ever tried to maintain a friendship with an ex, and things eventually got weird? Especially when you both start dating other people?

One woman recently refused to go to her ex-boyfriend’s spontaneous wedding when she found out she’d be expected to bring and serve food as well as help clean up by the end of the night. 

She and her ex-boyfriend split up seven years ago but have decided to remain good friends. They’re in the same friend group and see each other a handful of times each year.

She is currently engaged, and her ex eventually moved on as well, which she learned when she and her fiancé were introduced to his “new girlfriend, whom he had only gone on three dates with at his recent birthday party, 

“We thought it was a bit early for introductions and that the whole situation was a bit weird and intense, but he’s always been very emotionally immature, so I wasn’t that surprised,” she said.

“But I digress; I’m not here to judge his love life.”

Then, only two months after her ex’s birthday party, he told her he was marrying his girlfriend, and the wedding date was only weeks away.

She and her fiancé thought her ex and his future wife were moving rather fast, but they figured they shouldn’t judge and said they’d be at the wedding. 

However, the wedding came with some very unique responsibilities. 

javiindy – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

Her ex’s wedding was already going to be a bit of a hassle for her and her fiancé, as they had to travel for it, drive an hour from the ceremony venue to the reception venue, and stay in a hotel. She’d also have to pack her own food to eat because they couldn’t make accommodations for her dietary restrictions.

Then, when she saw her ex’s registry, she noticed everything on the list was super expensive, and it was hard to find a gift that was under $100.

All that aside, she was still prepared to attend the wedding, even if she had to do all of that. But then, she got an email with some more details about the big event just one week before the date.

“I received an email asking if I could bring a large homemade cake that was also vegan and gluten-free,” she recalled.

“I was also informed that I was expected to serve the food, clean up after the food, make teas and coffees, and wash up as ‘my contribution to help out.’ Now, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with keeping costs down and asking people to bring food for a ‘bring and share.’ However, I thought that a week’s notice was really cheeky.”

This was especially frustrating to her, as due to her dietary restrictions, she can’t really share food with anyone else. Plus, overall, she thought it was downright rude to ask your guests to serve people and clean up after the wedding. 

She eventually found out that some of her and her ex’s mutual friends received a similar email but that they’d be complying to keep the peace. However, she and her fiancé were furious over the email, and now they don’t want to go anymore.

“I really want to see my friends next weekend, and [to be honest], I do have a fear of missing out on the event,” she added.

“But I’m so annoyed with my ex for being so tight and not actually proving food [or] staff, but still expecting an expensive gift.”

Should she comply with her ex’s requests and go to the wedding or save herself the frustration and not go?

You can read the original post on Reddit here.

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