This woman and her friends, all in their mid-20s, were bridesmaids at their friend’s wedding.
In her friend group, some of her friends are working full-time and have mortgages on the homes they’ve purchased.
On the other hand, she’s currently still in college and has student debt. This is the first of her friends in this group to get married, so this is everyone’s first time as bridesmaids.
As their friend was planning her wedding, she was asking a lot of them, often with little notice in advance.
They were expected to pay half of the cost of their bridesmaid’s dresses, as well as more than $1,000 toward a bachelorette trip.
Unfortunately, they didn’t get to contribute any of their opinions about where to go or what to do on the trip.
Despite this, they didn’t argue because they wanted to be supportive of what their friend wanted for her dream wedding.
Even though the bride didn’t communicate it directly, she wanted the maid of honor to be completely responsible for planning the bridal shower.
“I asked how the maid of honor was going to pay for the shower because the bride had expectations for an ‘Instagram-worthy’ event (balloon arches, alcohol, food, and elaborate decorations). The bride’s response was, “I don’t know…ask her,” she said.
Several weeks later, the maid of honor told all of the bridesmaids that they would be chipping in for the bridal shower. She demanded this rather than ask.
She and all of the other bridesmaids thought it was strange that the bride hadn’t been the one to ask them to chip in for the bridal party, but they all contributed in order to keep the bride happy so that the party would be what she envisioned.
Months after this, prior to the bachelorette party trip, the bride demanded (once again, they were asked) that the bridesmaids be responsible for paying for all of the alcohol, snacks, and decorations for the entire trip.
In total, there were 15 women attending the trip, and the majority of them weren’t bridesmaids, so this was a lot to expect the bridesmaids to take on.
“At this point, the bridesmaids asked if it was okay if each person attending the bachelorette party could bring their own alcohol/snacks,” she explained.
“The bride became upset that we were ‘ruining’ her wedding experience by having opinions and questions on everything she asked for.”
“First, there was the bridal shower, then the bachelorette party. The bride said she Googled that bridesmaids were supposed to pay for the bridal shower and that we were ‘not street smart’ for not knowing this.”
Then, the bride claimed that she had questioned her other friends outside of her bridal party, and all of these friends claimed that the bridesmaids should foot the bill for “‘everything.'”
When the bride told them that they were making her feel anxious about her wedding, they felt like they really were the ones to blame for that.
The bride added that after she got married, she would need time away from them.
After that, she and the other bridesmaids did whatever the bride wanted and didn’t argue or question anything.
They even stepped forward without being asked and paid for one of the bride’s wedding desserts and some of the decorations.
“Post-wedding, the bride took space from us and didn’t invite us to a party she hosted. It’s been over a year, and she still holds resentment over the wedding issue and has gotten upset with us for lesser issues. We’ve offered to talk about it, but she hates confrontation and is avoiding the topic,” she shared.
In her view, they weren’t perfect as bridesmaids and made mistakes that caused the bride some anxiety.
However, she thinks they did their best to rectify the situation.
She thinks the bride is resentful of things she didn’t even confront them about, and it feels like the bride is completely unappreciative of all of the hard work they put in for all of her bridal events.
What would you have done if you were in her shoes?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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