She Caught Her Husband Lying About Being At His Female Coworker’s House, And Now She’s Unsure If She’s Being Gaslit Or If She Really Was Wrong For Snooping Through His Phone
When this 36-year-old woman met John, 40, the man who would eventually become her husband, she sold condos for a developer, and John oversaw the development of the condos. She’d been doing this job for many years and worked with a good-looking, accomplished man named Anton. While she and Anton were never romantically involved, they have remained close friends.
After she and her ex-boyfriend ended their relationship, Anton encouraged her to go out with John and was incredibly supportive of their engagement and marriage; Anton was thrilled their relationship worked out. Later, Anton resigned from his job and asked if he could continue partnering with her on projects, so they worked together for several more years. Eventually, she began a job at a different real estate company, and her career continued to go smoothly.
About two years ago, John began working for a different company. A month ago, he went out to a bar with some of his co-workers at the end of the workday without informing her that he’d be home late. She sent him a text to ask him what he wanted to do for dinner, and when he responded, he said she could make something. However, John didn’t arrive home until 9:30 p.m., hours after she finished making dinner.
“When I asked what took him so long, he mentioned his co-worker Max needed a ride home (40 minutes north of where we live; I know because we share our locations on Life360),” she said.
According to John, it took an hour to give Max a ride home, and he said that he still planned to eventually help Max repair his vehicle. She was irritated because she didn’t believe John’s explanation. Plus, he and his co-workers earn impressive salaries, so even if was true that Max’s car was having problems, he would have probably taken an Uber home instead of asking for a ride.
“So, while John was in the shower, I snooped through his phone and found he had a missed call from some girl whose phone number he’d gotten while at the bar,” she explained.
The woman who called John was a saved contact in his phone. After John got out of the shower, she asked him who the woman was and why she called him, and he came up with a story that she, once again, didn’t believe. After that, she was onto him and began keeping up with Life360 more frequently than usual.
The day after Valentine’s Day, she saw that John was at the same address he’d been on the night he claimed Max needed a ride home, and it was odd that he was at this address halfway through his workday. Her curiosity got the best of her, and she planned to drive over and find out who lived at this address. John was only at this location for less than an hour, so he’d already left by the time she got there.
Before she drove over, she looked up the property records of the address and saw that it was listed as an LLC. Even though her intention wasn’t to start drama, she wanted to see if her gut was right about John lying to her.
Drobot Dean – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
When she arrived, she realized the address was a house. She peeked in the mailbox and realized that the person living there was one of John’s co-workers, but it wasn’t Max. The person who lived at this house was a woman John worked with, whom she’d met on occasion. The woman is Colombian, in her 40s, divorced, good-looking, and charming. She was completely stunned and baffled.
“I confronted him, and he’s saying absolutely nothing is going on with her. He said she needed help with some housework and that I was violating his trust by going through his phone and chasing him down at this woman’s house like a stalker,” she shared.
She acknowledged that her actions were unhealthy and unethical and felt like a jerk. In hindsight, she knew she could have called John to find out where he was and what he was doing. At the same time, she thought he’d been lying to her, and it turned out that she was right about that.
Even if she’d called him, he would have likely lied about his whereabouts and what he was up to. During their argument, John compared her friendship with Anton to his two-year friendship with this female co-worker.
What advice would you give her?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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