She’s Thinking Of Dumping Her Older Boyfriend Because He Doesn’t Want More Children
One of the most difficult things to do is break up with someone you love because they don’t want the same things as you. For instance, many great relationships have ended because one person wanted marriage and kids while the other didn’t.
One woman is dating an older man with estranged children and desperately wants to have children of her own. However, he doesn’t want any more kids, and she’s unsure what to do.
She’s 32 and met a 49-year-old man on a dating app. Neither of them was expecting to get into a serious relationship, but they fell in love.
“We adore each other,” she said.
“We’re exclusive; we spend so much time together, and being with him feels like [he’s] healing parts of me that were hurting for so long. He’s caring, considerate, and consistent. I love him, and he loves me.”
However, her boyfriend does come with some baggage. He was previously married to his ex-wife for 20 years and has two kids, ages 17 and 20. He and his ex have separated for three years; unfortunately, his kids don’t speak to him.
He’s tried contacting them and reaching out, but they never respond. He’ll occasionally hear from his ex, but she sends him mean texts or tries to get more money from him.
This has been very hard on her boyfriend, as he misses his kids. Because of everything that’s happened, he struggles with his self-worth and sometimes feels he has nothing to give her.
“I do want a family one day,” she admitted.
Veronika Kraeva – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
“I want to be married and raise children with a good man. He has told me a few times now that he doesn’t want to have more kids, given his estranged relationship with his kids now. He doesn’t think he wants to do the whole marriage thing again, given his ‘failed’ marriage of 20 years. I understand his pain, [but] I also don’t want to give up my dreams.”
Because they can’t agree on having kids, they’ve started throwing around the idea of breaking up. She feels it would be unfair to make her boyfriend feel as though he has to have kids with her.
Plus, they haven’t been dating long, so if they were to break up, now would be the time to do it.
“I don’t want to hurt him more by leaving him or making him feel like he isn’t enough for me,” she added.
“How can I support him and still be true to my own needs?”
What would you do if you were in her position?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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