He Adopted The Child His Sister Wanted, And Now He’s Doubting He Made The Right Choice For This Boy’s Future
This 34-year-old man has two sisters: 31-year-old Jane and 36-year-old Amy. For ten years now, Amy has been trying to have a baby with her husband, but nothing has worked.
Two years ago, Amy tried IVF again, but due to some complications, doctors told her she was sterile.
Amy was crushed, as she and her husband desperately wanted their own family. Amy and her husband then thought about adoption, but this is going to be a lengthy road for them, as Amy’s husband acquired a criminal record at the age of 19.
“A year ago, my sister Jane gave birth to her son Sam,” he explained. “The pregnancy was the result of a one-night stand Jane had during her vacation in Italy, and although it was unexpected and the father wouldn’t be in the picture, Jane decided to keep the baby.”
“Sadly, Jane had a stroke when Sam was 6-months-old and passed away. It was very unexpected, and most of the family is still grieving. After the funeral, we started to discuss who will take Sam in.”
His parents are far too old to raise a child, which meant it was down to him or Amy to step up for Sam.
Amy excitedly said she was happy to take Sam, and it seemed to be a perfect idea initially. But then, as Amy kept talking about the adoption, he thought it was really weird.
Amy insisted on changing Sam’s first and last names before saying nobody should ever talk about Jane once she officially adopted Sam.
“Essentially, Amy wanted to raise Sam as her own and didn’t think telling him his bio mom passed away would do him any good,” he said.
LIGHTFIELD STUDIOS – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual child
“To me, this felt like Amy was trying to erase Jane’s memory and was treating her like some surrogate and not a sister whom she lost.”
“After much consideration, I didn’t like the idea that Sam would grow up without knowing who his bio mother was. And although I already have 5 children of my own, I decided to contest the adoption and volunteered to adopt him instead.”
He went to court, and it was ruled that he and his wife should adopt Sam. Amy is livid with him and calling him a jerk for destroying her opportunity to be a mom.
Amy pointed out that he already has several children, so he can’t possibly get how desperate she is to be a mom.
Some of their family members have piped up, accusing him of being selfish for taking this opportunity from Amy. These family members also believe that he didn’t think of what would be best for Sam and instead, he was only concerned with maintaining Jane’s memory.
“Although I don’t regret adopting Sam, I’m starting to doubt whether I made the right decision for his future,” he continued.
“I know that Amy would have made a great mother and that both she and her husband would absolutely adore Sam. And as their only child they would probably be able to provide him a better life financially. However them wanting to erase all memories of Jane just doesn’t feel right.”
What advice do you have for him?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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