She’s Starting To Resent Her Husband Ever Since He Called Her Lazy And Asked If She “Understood The Duties Of Being A Wife”
One of my biggest pet peeves is when stay-at-home moms or wives get called “lazy” because they don’t hold down a traditional full-time job but are still in charge of cooking, cleaning, and caring for their kids and husbands.
Taking care of a home and making it a warm, loving, inviting space takes a lot of work, and not everyone realizes that.
One woman is beginning to resent her husband, who called her lazy when she asked for help with some household duties.
She’s 29, and her husband is 30. She used to work a full-time job but will be leaving to serve in the Air Force at the end of the summer. To prepare for her upcoming duty, she quit her job and decided to spend some time taking care of her and her husband’s home while he continued to work his full-time job.
When her husband gets home, he expects not to have to do anything but relax as soon as he walks through the door.
“I clean up around the house, cook his meals from scratch, do laundry, and take care of our dog while he’s at work, all of which are done or nearly done by the time he gets home,” she said.
“Lately, he’s been saying I’m ‘slacking‘ and ‘getting lazy on him‘ because I asked him to fix his own plate the other night. I cooked, but he wasn’t ready to eat, so the food sat out for a while, and I packed it away and cleaned the kitchen. Once I came upstairs and got comfortable in bed, he was ready for his food. Then, last night, I got takeout, and he asked me to pick up some cookies from Crumbl for him, which I did. While [I was] on the phone with him driving home, I asked if he could feed the dog so I could go straight to fixing plates, and he said he was busy watching videos.“
When she got home that evening, she was feeling frustrated with her husband, as she thought he’d offer to help her with one of the smaller evening tasks, but he didn’t. Once again, he told her he wasn’t hungry at dinnertime, so after feeding the dog, she packed away his food until he was ready to eat.
At bedtime, he asked if something was bothering her and if she felt her duties as a wife were too overwhelming.
LIGHTFIELD STUDIOS – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
“He questioned if I ‘understood the duties of being a wife‘ and tried to make me understand that he expects to just come home and relax after work,“ she recalled.
“He [said he] doesn’t mind walking the dog or taking out the trash at night because it’s dark out, but even those little things are ‘problematic‘ because he’s tired [while] I have the time to do them. After talking to him, he apologized for calling me lazy, but I still feel bad about it.”
While she understands that the responsibilities of taking care of the house and preparing meals mostly fall on her due to her schedule, she doesn’t think it’s fair for her husband to accuse her of ‘slacking‘ or call her lazy if she needs him to do a few basic things for himself in the evening.
Since her husband’s been acting that way, she’s been feeling herself growing resentful of him.
Should she feel bad for resenting her husband, or are her feelings understandable?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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