5 Signs Your Mom Or Dad Is Toxic
No Mom Or Dad Is Perfect
The following column is the opinion and analysis of the writer. No parent is perfect—they all make more mistakes than we can count because we’re all human here.
Maybe they accidentally burned dinner or keep calling you by the dog’s name. But there’s a huge difference between parenting slip-ups and behavior that leaves you with emotional scars for the rest of your life.
Here Are 5 Signs Your Mom Or Dad Is Toxic
Normal parents will ground you when you do something wrong. Toxic parents will ground and gaslight you. They make you feel guilty just for being born. It’s more than “tough love.” Here are five signs that your mom or dad is toxic.
1. They Are Verbally Or Emotionally Abusive
Toxic parents can be verbally and/or emotionally abusive as a way to wield power over their children. They may actively try to lower their children’s self-esteem by belittling them, including calling them names and embarrassing them in public.
They will gaslight their kids into getting what they want from them. Sometimes, it’s hard to spot this type of abuse, but it can be just as harmful as physical abuse.
2. They Are Violent
If your mom or dad resorts to acts of violence like hitting, kicking, or choking you when you’re angry, you will most likely develop fear, anxiety, and anger problems.
Some parents think violence is the answer when it comes to teaching children a lesson, but it actually has severe negative consequences and will only damage relationships.
3. They Are Controlling And Manipulative
Toxic parents can be overly involved in their kids’ lives in order to control what they do. As a result, your independence, individuality, and freedom become very limited. It’s important for children to learn to respect authority, but it’s also normal for them to push back because that is a sign of growth and development.
When the authority of toxic parents is challenged, they may guilt-trip their children back into submission. They may continue to try to control your decisions, even into adulthood, which leads to feelings of resentment and dependency.
4. They Expect Admiration
Another sign of a toxic parent is that they need to be constantly admired, particularly by their children. They want to be praised for all the good things they do, and if they don’t receive that, they can get angry.
They hardly ever return that kind of praise and admiration to their children and won’t accept the slightest bit of criticism, but will gladly dole it out.
5. They Are Jealous and Unsupportive
When you start to develop close relationships with other people, a toxic parent may feel jealous because they perceive those relationships as threats.
They may also bad-mouth and be unsupportive of your relationships, accomplishments, choices, and interests as a way to manipulate you. Keeping you down is how they keep you under their thumb.
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