She Told Her Stepmom She Hates Her For Being Envious Of Her Late Mom
When this 17-year-old woman was just 2 or 3 years old, her parents split up, and a couple of years later, her dad started dating a new woman who eventually became her stepmother. Initially, they got along really well, too, and she actually liked her dad’s new wife.
But then, when she was 7 years old, her mother sadly passed away. And now, a decade later, she thinks her stepmom is still “pathetically jealous” of her late mom, and it’s ruined their relationship.
For some context, back when her mom passed away, she was still a young girl and went to live full-time with her dad and stepmom.
“Things were good between me and my stepmom. She was never my mom, but she was still my family, and I always had a really good time with her when we were together,” she recalled.
Apparently, her stepmom was the “fun” parent; meanwhile, her dad was the one who set boundaries and disciplined her when she stepped out of line. Sure, her stepmom helped enforce the rules, yet her dad took the lead because he never wanted her to resent his new wife for entering the picture and acting like her mother.
That was all fine and good until about two years ago, when she overheard her stepmom saying some horrible things on Mother’s Day. While they were eating with her dad’s side of the family, her stepmom randomly left the table, which she found weird. And soon afterward, she overheard her stepmom badmouthing her late mom to her aunt.
“That woman’s been dead for years, and I’ve been here, raising her longer, and I’m just the stepmom while that stupid [jerk] is still the one she recognizes every Mother’s Day, and she’s the one people bring up to her,” her stepmom said.
Her stepmom’s words were dripping with jealousy, and she was shocked to hear her mother insulted like that. But perhaps the worst part? Her stepmom tried to claim that her mother had contributed nothing to her life, something that she feels couldn’t be more false.
“My stepmom’s whole thing was that she’s done more for me and should be taking the place my mom does,” she detailed.
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Instead of swaying her toward a more traditional mother-daughter relationship, though, what she overheard just made her dislike her stepmom more than ever. So, she started acting distant and cold. At the same time, her stepmom continued being snarky about her mom, an attitude that even her half-siblings and father picked up on.
Nonetheless, her dad never did anything about it, and over the past two years, there have been instances where her stepmom has attempted to act as if their relationship was completely fine. She, on the other hand, continued to ice her stepmom out.
And finally, her stepmom confronted her about it the other night. Why? Well, she didn’t attend a party celebrating a promotion her stepmom received or say congratulations. Her stepmom approached her after that and accused her of suddenly realizing she was a teenager and “hating her for no reason.”
“I told her it wasn’t for no reason. I started disliking her because she’s pathetically jealous of my mom, and I heard everything she said two years ago,” she revealed.
Rather than being mortified, her stepmom was actually just angry that she’d overheard the vent session and that the statements hadn’t made her “feel bad” or inclined to help make her stepmom feel more valued.
“I told her she deserved no reassurances from me for talking about mom that way,” she noted.
However, her stepmom still didn’t back down and argued that her attitude needed a ton of work. On top of that, her stepmom even got her dad involved and complained about her.
Now, her stepmom believes she needs to apologize for rehashing what was said years ago during a private discussion she was “never supposed to hear.” But she disagrees and has been left wondering whether calling her stepmom pathetically jealous (as well as letting that sour their relationship) is really so unreasonable or not.
How would you feel if you overheard your stepmom disparaging your late mother like that? Does she deserve an apology from her stepmom? What advice would you give her?
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