His Wife Wants To Use The Money His Son Inherited From His Mom To Help All Their Kids, But He's Not Letting Her To This

Money always has a way of showing someone's true colors on a long enough timeline, and sometimes it takes years for the greed to shine through.

His wife didn't ask for help with the mortgage or a little flexibility, but she did expect him to turn his late wife's final wishes into a shared asset, even though they had previously drawn neat lines around their finances.

It's sad to me that his wife is allowing money to come between them, and it's turning into a painful tug-of-war with no solution in sight.

This man and his wife are in their 40s, and they both have children from previous relationships. His first wife passed away, and he had a 16-year-old son with her.

His new wife got divorced, and she shares custody of her 13-year-old daughter and her 12-year-old son with her ex. He and his wife then went on to have two kids together: a four-year-old and a two-year-old.

"When my late wife was sick, she told me she wanted a % of the compensation she was issued for her medical misdiagnosis to go to our son's savings," he explained.

"She also had a second savings account she wanted to add to it. This was on top of what the two of us had saved for him before her illness."

"I honored her wishes, and I continued saving for our son's future. This is a promise I made to my late wife that I have stood by. I also promised I would protect it and make sure it was only ever for him, nobody else."

Back when he began to seriously date his new wife, they discussed the future at length and what they would do for their future kids.

Julia - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

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He did tell his new wife that he saved up a lot of money, as did his late wife. They didn't talk numbers exactly regarding how much cash they had each already saved for their kids, but they did come to an agreement; they would set aside a specific amount of money each month for their respective children.

Lately, his wife has been extremely stressed out, as they haven't exactly hit those savings goals due to situations that they can't control, like unexpected household repairs popping up.

"A few weeks ago, my wife told me we should put all the cards on the table and discuss what all five kids have and decide how we proceed with making sure everyone gets what they need for the future," he added.

"I told her I would happily discuss what I have saved for my oldest, but I would not be discussing the money left by his mom. She pushed back on it and said all the money should be taken into consideration."

"I told her we don't know what all the money is. I said our parents could be saving money for the kids' futures, her ex could have money for my stepkids, and his parents could have money for my stepkids. We can't say for certain what everyone will have at the end, and it's only fair to discuss what she and I have and can save."

His wife accused him of not trusting her, and he questioned her about why she wanted to know how much money his late wife had left his son.

Eventually, his wife admitted that she wanted his son's money to be split evenly among all their kids, and he insisted that was off the table.

He underscored to his wife that his late wife's money is his oldest son's, and so he won't force him to share it with any of the other children they have. This turned into a fight, as his wife wouldn't back down.

"She feels like that's wrong when we're married. I told her it's not my money, nor is it her money or money that we can or should be accessing," he continued.

"It's from my late wife to our son, and that's all there is to it. My wife said she feels like I'm keeping her in the dark and not trusting her with something important."

"She said it cuts her ability to fully engage in conversations we need to be able to have and decisions we need to make as a couple."

I don't think he's being secretive; he's keeping a promise he made, which impacts his son's future. That money was never part of his shared marital plan with his new wife, and it's not fair for her to act entitled to the cash just because things are tight for them financially now.

If his wife truly respected the circumstances, she wouldn't be asking him to divide something sacred. This is an enormous red flag to me, and I'm worried his wife might start treating his son differently because of this.

He needs to stick to not telling her about how much money his son has, and he also should not let her bully him into sharing it with all the kids, because that's wrong.

Do you think he's a jerk for refusing to tell his wife what kind of money his son has and for declining to share that cash with all the kids?

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