What happens when the magic of Christmas meets the harsh reality of poverty, leaving a parent to navigate the thin line between a child’s entitlement and their desperate need to fit in?
Several months ago, this woman lost her job, and ever since then, she’s had a difficult time paying her bills. She definitely couldn’t afford to buy her eight-year-old twin girls Christmas presents, so she had to use the Angel Tree program to make sure they would have presents under the tree.
One of her girls requested arts and crafts as well as a doll on her Angel Tree list. She got a crochet kit, a slime-making set, a paint-by-numbers kit, origami paper, Crayola markers, a Barbie, and LEGOs.
Her second girl wrote down girly stuff, skincare products, and an iPhone on her list. She asked her daughter to put down more realistic items, but she said she was too old to play with toys.
The person who shopped for her other twin got her a unicorn water bottle, a friendship bracelet-making kit, a squishmallow, a doll, nail art pens, and a Hello Kitty purse.
“I thought any 8-year-old girl would love these presents, but when she unwrapped them, the first thing she did was start tearing up and asking why her sister got everything she wanted, but she didn’t get a single thing she asked for,” she explained.
“She refused to even open her gifts and spent the entire day sulking and talking about how unfair it was. I tried to wait a week to let her calm down, but she still insisted that Santa was favoring her sister and getting childish toys was just as bad as getting nothing.”
“So I thought if she was going to act that way, then I might as well just give her gifts to my other daughter instead, since she’ll actually be grateful for them.”
Her grateful twin tried to make her ungrateful one feel better by saying she was super lucky to get so many wonderful presents. After that, she decided to take all of the Angel Tree presents away from her bratty twin and give them to her grateful one.
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That only made her bratty twin angrier, and she is now saying her sister always gets to have everything. She filled one of her friends in on what happened, and her friend called her horrible.
Her friend thinks her bratty twin is not old enough to get how money works and is only trying to fit in with her classmates, which is why she asked for such pricey presents to begin with.
Her friend said she understands why her bratty twin is mad that Santa didn’t give her what she wanted, but made sure her sister got everything on her list.
“But if you ask me, I think this is a great learning opportunity to teach her to be grateful for what she gets,” she concluded.
I do understand where this mom is coming from, but I do not agree with her approach. It wasn’t wise to give her bratty twin’s presents to her sister, as that will just breed resentment for probably the rest of her life and drive a wedge between the girls.
There was a better way to go about teaching her bratty twin how to be grateful/deal when we don’t get things we want without ruining the bond with her sister in the process.
It would have made more sense if she sat down and told her bratty twin that Santa only brings practical gifts, or what he’s able to, or nobody really knows what he’s going to put under the tree.
There were different ways to frame this to a child who still believes in magic, yet doesn’t understand that iPhones cost as much as some people’s rent.
What do you think?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
