If you uncovered that your mom spent your whole life sitting on an enormous secret that impacted you and your sister, would you still be willing to keep that information a secret, or would you want it to come to light?
A year ago, this 30-year-old woman and her 37-year-old sister thought it would be a good idea to take DNA tests, and they shockingly learned that they’re half-sisters, not full ones.
Their mom knows that they’re in on this, but will not speak to them about how this happened. Their mom also wants them to continue to keep this secret.
She’s spent the last few years living with her sister, and she’s her best friend. For quite a while, her sister has been doubtful of their dad being her biological father, mainly because they couldn’t look more different.
And that is why they made the choice to get DNA tests done. Back in July 2024, the results came back, proving they do have separate dads.
They’ve done more digging and can’t find any connections to her sister’s paternal side of the family, but her sister really wants to know more about her roots.
When they made the discovery, their mom had cancer and was receiving treatment, so they refrained from adding to her stressful time.
“My mom is very old-school Mexican and has never been good at talking about difficult things. When emotional topics come up, she tends to cry, shut down, or avoid them completely,” she explained.
“My sister has gone to therapy and has really worked on breaking some of those generational patterns. My sister told my mom she knew in August 2025. That conversation happened privately between them.”
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“During that conversation, my mom said my sister’s biological father passed away when she was about one year old. She also said she would try to draw a picture of him or find a photo. But she hasn’t followed through. They’ve only talked about it maybe three times since then.”
Her mom is aware that she knows the secret, but she pretends that’s not reality. Her mom will not tell her husband or their other family members that she and her sister don’t share the same dad.
Her sister has taken the heartbreaking news like a champ and hasn’t let it negatively impact her bond with their mom too much. But these days, their conversations revolve around small talk, and nothing goes deeper than that.
She isn’t as close to her mom since finding out, and she hardly calls her on the phone. Her mom does still call her every few weeks, but she doesn’t ask how she’s doing; she just talks about herself.
“Part of me understands there may have been complicated circumstances back then. But that was 37 years ago. What bothers me is how she’s handling it now,” she continued.
“I feel like my sister deserves more openness about where she came from. It may have started as my mom’s secret, but it’s my sister’s life.”
“The problem is if I bring it up directly, my mom will probably cry, shut down, or say I’m hurting her feelings. How does someone even approach this? We don’t wanna lose what little relationship we have with her.”
Well, it’s not like she and her sister can make their mom tell the truth, and I’m not necessarily buying that her sister’s dad is no longer alive.
It’s certainly not right that her mom is keeping her mouth shut on all of this, and maybe she and her sister can sit down with her to convince her to open up.
What advice do you have for her?
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By Bre Avery Zacharski
Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology, and... More about Bre Avery Zacharski
