This woman and her fiancé have been dating since high school. During college, they lived together for three and a half years.
Unfortunately, the last two years that she and her fiancé lived together did not go well, and she ended up breaking up with him for a period of time.
Before the breakup, her now-fiancé had quit his job while she was working two jobs and attending college full-time.
He whined all the time about how he was failing all of his classes. Yet, at the same time, he slept in and played video games all day instead of studying.
Even worse, her fiancé wasn’t paying his part of the monthly bills yet left all of the cleaning and cooking up to her while treating her terribly.
“Time passes. He attends therapy, graduates, stabilizes, and honestly becomes such a good man. We reconnected and dated again. Life happens, and we end up in different cities due to work. He also just bought a house because his mortgage for a three-bedroom is cheaper than what he is paying for a one-bedroom apartment. He put $15,000 down,” she said.
She and her fiancé had a discussion about her contributing $900 per month once she moved in with him, and that money would go towards bills. Initially, she didn’t have a problem with this arrangement.
However, her fiancé later brought up the idea of drafting a prenup, and she wasn’t thrilled about this.
While she acknowledged the importance of him wanting to protect his financial assets, she didn’t think a prenup made sense in the context of their relationship.
They have been dating since they were 15-years-old, and when they add everything up, her fiancé owes her money.
Plus, in order to live in her fiancé’s house, she is the one who will be spending money on relocating and going through the stress of job searching.
“I agreed but told him we needed to settle his ‘debts’ with me and have an established leasing agreement,” she explained.
“This offended/made him super upset. We have a notarized contract because I took out $10,000 loans after he lost his scholarships and was denied approval. Despite it, I have been paying and never asked for money back before now.”
In total, her fiancé’s car cost $6,000, and to help pay for it, she gave him $2,500 with the promise that he would pay her back in time, but he never did. She never demanded the money back.
Over the last two years that she and her fiancé lived together before she temporarily broke up with him, she was the one paying all of their monthly expenses once he quit his job.
“I didn’t ask for any back, but I sure pointed it out. And I decided that it would only be fair for me to pay for a market-room rate,” she shared.
“We live in the south, and that’s $500-$650, utilities included. I also started requesting 1/2 of vet bills as ‘kitty support’ since one of our cats has diabetes.”
Her fiancé has agreed to all of her requests, but he seems overwhelmed and depressed about all of it. Currently, he makes double the amount of money that she does.
She is aware of the fact that her fiancé most likely never thought that she would ask him to pay her back, and she also wonders if he forgot about how much money she’s loaned him over the years.
Now, she feels bad because she never made it clear years ago that the money she loaned her fiancé needed to eventually be paid back.
When her fiancé mentioned a prenup, she felt instantly angry about it, and her fiancé, in turn, was upset that she brought all of the money she’d given him that he never gave back to her.
What would you do if you were in her shoes?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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