Women Who Struggled With Their Self-Esteem Give Tips On How They Were Finally Able To Find Their Confidence In Their Own Skin

Being comfortable and confident in your own skin can be a life-long journey, but it doesn’t have to be.

One user named somehow28 recently asked women on Reddit to share their tips on how they finally were able to stop struggling with their own self-esteem, and here are some of my favorite stories from women who were able to overcome their insecurities.

Get ready to kiss your self-esteem problems goodbye!

Drobot Dean – stock.adobe.com

She Faked It Until She Made It

“Faked it until I started to believe it myself. A big part of this was to stop making self-deprecating jokes.”

“An exercise I did frequently in this process was to list 3 things I like about myself and 3 things I dislike.”

“These had to be things I had control over. Then I created a plan of action to minimize the things I didn’t like, and maximize the things I did.”

Smerviemore

She Looks At The Bad Sides Of Other People And Their Lives

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“I’m not really on social media, so I don’t get bombarded by photos and stories that make my life seem less than. But another trick is to really (really) take a good look at other people living other lives and instead of focusing on all the parts that are amazing, make a catalog of all the bad parts.”

“I’ve been privileged enough to land on some top-tier university campuses in my life and meet some highly successful people. And let me tell you, their lives are always falling apart in some unseen corner that they’re hiding from the world.”

“You have examples of “top people” in fields going through messy divorces, having mental health crises, losing their way…Then you start realizing that even when life looks shiny and beautiful, most people are struggling in some sort of way.”

“It just tends to look messier from the inside and prettier from the outside. And the person with the beautiful life? You just haven’t figured out what’s wrong with them yet. So one way into self-esteem is actually recognizing that everyone looks better from a distance, so since you’re closest to yourself you’re always going to see more flaws in yourself than anyone else.”

“And the other is self-compassion. It’s knowing that you’re struggling in a 100% human way, you’re flawed like everyone else. And there never was a member of our species that didn’t struggle, and it’s completely part of the package.”

“And the kinder you are with yourself about being human the more you will start talking yourself up rather than down.”

mbliggie

She Just Woke Up And Chose To Have High Self-Esteem

“I had very low self-esteem some years ago. It changed when I decided to have high self-esteem. That sounds odd, but hear me out.”

“I woke up and thought “what would I do if I had high self-esteem?”, and then I did those things. I wore that top, I asked that guy out, I applied for that job: I pretended I had high self-esteem.”

“And over time, it wasn’t pretend anymore, it was just how I acted.”

“Since then I’ve always had high self-esteem. More often than not, people complimented me on my outfit, even though I was scared to wear it. And the guys usually said “yes”. I also did way better in my career once I started to speak up for myself.”

“It’s a simple mental challenge to try for a while, at least. It has helped me immensely.”

Cupcakelegend

She Embraces Being An Individual

“I don’t know how to help someone else with it, but for me, my self-esteem comes from a viewpoint of acknowledging my individuality.”

“It’s not an emotional or affirmation type thing, I just kind of understand that there is only me. I can’t be anyone else, no one else can be me.”

“I dispassionately accept that I am important to myself because I must be. My self-esteem grows from that basic principle.”

“I find it is also helpful to avoid talking down about myself (internally and out loud). Even when it’s a harmless joke I only do it rarely.”

jaqenjayz

She Makes Sure Her Routines Bring Her Joy

“Last year, age 27, was such a good year for me in terms of self-confidence. It helped that I got a job I’d been working towards since college—but I also started treating myself seriously. This is my only body in my only life. So I’ve made all these routines that bring me joy and make me feel good about myself.”

“On Sundays, I go grocery shopping and listen to murder podcasts. One night a week, I cook something terribly caloric and delicious (this is quite often charcuterie!). I read more.”

“I only follow my friends/family on social media. I light candles. I go on walks. I set boundaries. I dance around my living room to old songs that make me happy. (What’s interesting about all of that to me is that I gained weight over the pandemic—and somehow I’m happier with myself than ever.)”

“All of that taking care of myself and my interests has made me a better partner and friend—and increased my self-esteem so much. I like who I am!”

gruesometwosome27

She Surrounds Herself With Empowering Things

“Listen to empowering songs. Read books which empower women (women don’t owe you pretty by Florence given for example) and practice self-worth habits eg don’t be around people who make you not feel good, do spend time doing things that make you happy.”

“Do and wear what makes YOU feel good. For me, buying new underwear and dancing to my fave songs in the mirror actually makes me so happy and confident in myself – and when you’re content with yourself the world sees that as well!”

“Write all the things that are good about yourself and all the qualities you want to possess. repeat them to yourself. Often.”

“I have a list of things on my phone to remember in my daily life … one of them is “be brave” another is “trust your gut” – so when I get nervous or doubt myself I read this list of things and I feel like I can take on the world.”

“It’s not an overnight thing and even the most confident people still have breakdowns and self-doubt. But try to think of yourself in the best light possible when you can every day and it’ll soon become a habit !! All the best.”

PatientPersonality58

She Stopped Following Certain People On Social Media And Started Practicing Self-Care

“Stop following people on social media that only show the perfect edited side of thing. Stop following people whose bodies I compare mine to even though we have different body structures.”

“Follow people who are working on self-improvement but also are confident and show the real side of them selfs. Self-care and good diet! 80% of the time be taking care of yourself well, aka good food that is nutritious and yummy workout style that you love good skin and hair care etc.”

“20% of the time indulging and don’t think about it. Sometimes this looks like having a really clean diet but having a little bit of wine and chocolate in the evenings that week. Other times it may look like mostly nutritious food but 2 meals eating out that week.”

No-Independence-1579

Hi, I'm Bre, Chip Chick's CEO! I have a degree in Textile/Surface Design from The Fashion Institute of Technology. ... More about Bre Avery Zacharski

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