Her Boyfriend Told Her That He Isn’t Attracted To Her, But He Does Think She’s Perfect In Other Ways
A young woman has a boyfriend that she’s been with for the last 10 months, but there’s an enormous issue in their relationship; her boyfriend doesn’t think that she’s pretty and he isn’t that attracted to her.
From the time she began dating her boyfriend, he disclosed to her that he has always been obsessed with a woman’s looks, yet he’s attempting to change that.
She also is aware that her boyfriend has just been attracted to Caucasian girls that are tall and have big backsides and thighs.
In contrast, she’s Asian, tiny, and only 4’9″, which she is aware isn’t exactly her boyfriend’s type, and she believes that’s the problem, aside from the fact that he doesn’t really like her face.
“I know beauty is subjective— I have been called ugly by some & gorgeous by others,” she explained.
“I struggle feeling insecure about myself apart from how he views me, but being with him is hard because I’m used to my partners always being really into/attracted to me.”
“He isn’t sure if he can change but he’s working on it. He said it’s draining for him because he feels bad that it’s even an issue but he just isn’t that’s attracted to me. He said some days he thinks I’m cute, other days just “okay.”
Since her boyfriend is not all-in on their relationship, she has found herself hesitating as well, and she isn’t sure she is interested in investing in a lasting relationship with him if they each are unsure of it being the best thing for them.
Despite that, she and her boyfriend believe their relationship to be the most straightforward and nurturing relationship that they have been in over the course of their lives.
uinmine – stock.adobe.com
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He isn’t attracted to her, but he thinks that she’s flawless in other ways. They haven’t yet broken up for fear of their relationship growing to be “better.” They both are hopeful that their relationship can be what they want it to be in time.
She currently is living in an apartment with her boyfriend, and their lease is good through August, so that certainly proves difficult for any of them to take a bit of time apart to consider their options here.
Complicating their situation further is the fact that her boyfriend has a toddler daughter who lives with them on Fridays and Sundays, and although she does love this little girl, she never wanted to have children.
It’s a huge deal for her to have accepted her boyfriend, as he comes with a kid, and she knows that her boyfriend is not going to be able to experience living in other places because he needs to be where they are right now for his daughter.
She might want to experience living somewhere else though. Additionally, her time and all of her boyfriend’s time on the weekends is devoted to her boyfriend’s daughter, and they never get free time to just themselves.
It’s proving tough for her to figure out the pros and cons here, and she understands nobody has a flawless relationship, so that makes it more difficult for her to figure out what the best thing to do is.
“People may think he’s shallow for caring so much about looks but he’s not doing it on purpose,” she acknowledged. “But what does it say about me that I care so much that he doesn’t think I’m super pretty?”
“Isn’t that shallow of me too? Isn’t it my ego that’s hurt he doesn’t see me that way? He also admitted that he can’t fall fully in love with me because of the looks thing.”
“That my personality is a 12 out of 10 so he wants to see if his preference will change.”
Do you think she should leave this guy or try to stay with him? You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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