She’s Pretty Sure Her Therapist Has Feelings For Her, And She Wants To Confront Him

Drobot Dean - stock.adobe.com
Drobot Dean - stock.adobe.com

A 19-year-old woman has been seeing her 25-year-old male therapist for half a year now, and she goes to him once every single week for a session.

She communicates really well with her therapist, and he has helped her have some major breakthroughs so far.

She really does like her therapist, but the last two times she saw him, she’s left his office feeling pretty puzzled.

“These past sessions in combination with a few other comments have brought me to a boiling point of feeling…well like there’s some unethical behavior going on,” she explained.

“I want to address it with him so I can have clarification and closure as I’m most likely not going to be resuming therapy with him.”

She’s sure that her therapist has feelings for her, and she’s planning on confronting him about it. All along, her therapist has made comments to her that she has just assumed were part of her therapy or some kind of a joke her therapist was making.

Looking back, she knows that’s really not the case here, and it all started when she was doing her initial evaluation with him.

Her therapist had asked her if she was seeing anyone, and when she revealed that she did have a boyfriend, he wanted to know if their physical relationship was “good.”

The second red flag she noticed was when she was describing a disagreement between her and her boyfriend to her therapist.

Drobot Dean – stock.adobe.com

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Her therapist commented that she must have “made up” with her boyfriend, which she can see now as a “weird and wrong assumption” for her therapist to make.

Then, on St. Patrick’s Day this year, she saw her therapist for a session and he really did cross the line even further.

“On St. Patrick’s Day, he told me “if you had been wearing pink I may have lost my license.” When I asked what he meant he told me there’s a tradition that if you wear pink on this day, you get kissed,” she said.

Moving on to the last 2 times that she saw him, she was really quite upset over a surgery she went through, and she sobbed a lot in her sessions. At the end of one of her most recent sessions, her therapist asked if she would like him to hug her.

“It flustered me but after a few seconds of thinking, I said yes,” she continued. “I honestly didn’t think anything of it. It felt innocent to me.”

“Our next session, as soon as we sit down he tells me we need to talk. He then says: “I hugged you last session and I wanted you to know I stepped over my own boundaries. It came from a place of wanting to take care of you, but that’s not my job.” I was absolutely floored. I didn’t know how to respond to this and it took a while for me to process what he said.”

When she stops to think about every single one of these instances, she really is finding her therapist’s behavior towards her confusing.

She really would like to just ask him if he has feelings for her and listen to his response. She understands it’s not really acceptable to address this with him and it probably will make him uneasy to ask this question, but she feels that she “needs to know.”

Do you think it’s ok for her to ask her therapist if he has feelings for her, or should she stop seeing him and say nothing?

You can read the original post on Reddit here.

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