She Pays For Almost Everything In Her Relationship, And She’s Starting To Think Her Boyfriend Is With Her For Money

armina - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purpose only, not the actual person
armina - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purpose only, not the actual person

A 29-year-old woman has been dating her 32-year-old boyfriend for the last 4 years, and throughout their whole relationship, her boyfriend has been completing medical school or his residency.

She says that her boyfriend “has a pretty crippling amount of student debt” which is very different from her own financial situation.

She managed to complete college without any loans, and she went on to get a job that does pay her quite well.

Over the years, she has been happy to pay for the majority of things in her relationship since her boyfriend isn’t in a good place financially.

She has paid for their rent, their food, their vacations, and so much more. “I loved him and didn’t want him to be stressed over finances,” she explained.

“And he always tried to cover what he could which I appreciated.” She has started to notice that this is no longer the case, and it seems that her boyfriend has lost his appreciation for her and her contributions to their relationship.

Their current situation is that they each pay half of their rent, yet she foots the rest of their expenses.

Additionally, she does pretty much all of their cleaning and cooking, though from time to time, she gets too stressed out about her job and will have a professional cleaner come in to help.

She got into a disagreement with her boyfriend not that long ago, and she tried to tell her boyfriend that she would like him to make her feel more appreciated, and more loved too.

armina – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purpose only, not the actual person

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Her boyfriend’s response to that was questioning why that was before he said that she does nothing for him.

It’s starting to dawn on her that her boyfriend might just be with her at this point for what she brings to the table money-wise.

He has also made a couple of comments that have concerned her, like him saying she should pay to have the professional cleaner come out more, and he will also brush off the price of things even though she’s the one paying for it.

“I fell in love with the person he was years ago but our dynamic is so different now that it’s been hard to wrap my head around it,” she added.

“I keep wondering if it’s because he’s stressed and he’ll get better once he feels settled but… I realize that I don’t want anyone to treat me this way no matter how stressed they are. I surely don’t do the same to him and I’ve been stressed plenty of times…”

She feels that the closer her boyfriend gets to the end of his residency, the worse he ends up treating her.

She’s left wondering if this is a healthy or “normal” part of a relationship where one person is in a better financial situation than the other, and she’s also curious as to whether she’s being “selfish” for wanting her boyfriend to appreciate her more.

What do you think? You can read the original post on Reddit here.

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