To Elope Or Not To Elope: The Pros And Cons Of Tying The Knot In A Private Ceremony

While practically everything shut down during the COVID-19 pandemic, weddings could not be stopped. Couples embraced their love and made their nuptials a magical affair no matter where they were or who could attend.
This move represents just one of the changing trends in the wedding industry– with traditional “priorities” being replaced by more nuanced ideas of romance.
In a similar vein is the decision to elope– which actually used to be a scandalous practice. In the past, couples were thought to elope in secret, whether that be because their families did not approve or for another reason.
Today, though, the conversation surrounding elopement has completely changed. Now, more and more couples relish the idea of having a small, intimate ceremony– whether that be locally in their home state or abroad in a picturesque location.
There are many big upsides that draw couples to elope, too, that tie back to money, time, and pressure.
At the same token, though, eloping is not for everyone– as there are drawbacks to every wedding event that will matter more to some fiancés than others.
So, let’s take a look at some of the pros and cons of modern elopements to determine if this kind of event is right for you.
Upsides To Eloping
One of the most obvious pros of eloping concerns your ability to exercise full spontaneity. After all, without a massive guest list, there is a ton of flexibility and few timeline restrictions.

hreniuca – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual people
This means that if you decide to take a detour after your ceremony and before celebrating over some dinner, you can do so without worrying about other too many other people.
Simply bring the few friends or family members who acted as your witnesses, and do whatever you want to celebrate at that moment.
Another massive upside that brides and grooms love is the lack of pressure. Forget formal greetings, anxiety-inducing speeches in front of big crowds, and even just the pressure to be in full bridal glam.
If you elope, there is an air of freedom– meaning that couples won’t feel like they have to “perform” for their guests. Instead, you and your partner can just focus on each other and whatever makes you both feel most loved without any external pressure to act a certain way.
Finally, elopements are surefire money savers. Without a massive guest list, you have infinitely more options for venues. You also won’t have to worry about providing food, drinks, and favors for 100 or more guests.
Instead, that money can be allocated toward a variety of other things– such as choosing a true bucket list-worthy ceremony destination, embarking on a longer honeymoon, or even the downpayment on a house.
Whatever you choose to use the extra funds for, the savings will be there waiting for you to play with.
Downsides To Eloping
While elopement may be the right choice for some people, it is not always an ideal way to tie the knot for every couple for a few key reasons.
First of all, the sheer nature of eloping means that you will not be able to invite all of your family members or close friends. And some people in your life may have a big problem with that.
So, it is important to take stock of what matters most to you. And if you really want to elope and hope to avoid damaging already strained relationships, it is critical to have a conversation upfront about your wedding intentions.
Be transparent if someone close to you will not be invited to witness your wedding day. Maybe even schedule an after-elopement party to celebrate with loved ones who were unable to attend. This can help mitigate any hard feelings and ensure you get the best of both worlds.
Another downside to eloping concerns vendors– specifically photographers and videographers. Because while you may save money on venues and food, you will want to hire the best photographers and videographers you can for your elopement.
After all, if you have little to no guests attending your wedding, you are definitely going to want to share photos and videos of the event afterward. You will want to save the memories for yourself, too, since your sister or best friend from college might not be there to snap some pics on their iPhones.
So, don’t forget to prioritize finding a good photographer and videographer. Ensure that their portfolio matches your vision and that they are trustworthy and reliable. That way, you will have solid memories to look back on from your big day.
Finally, one more con to eloping is the reality that you and your partner will not receive as many wedding gifts.
Of course, your wishes for an intimate and romantic wedding day may not equate to your necessity for gifts. But, if you are looking to purchase a home or even get some money to put toward a savings fund, this may be a big factor for you to consider.
Your close friends and family members may still opt to send gifts or money following your nuptials. However, with elopements, gifts are not an expectation.
So, unless you plan to host a party post-elopement, you cannot expect gifts from everyone.
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