Her Best Friend Asked Her To Be Her Maid of Honor, But Then She Sprung It On Her That She’s Having A Destination Wedding, And She Can’t Afford To Attend, So She Wants To Stay Home Now
This 25-year-old woman and her best friend, also 25, met during their first year of college.
Her best friend transferred to a different school, but they stayed in contact and visited each other once or twice a year even though they lived really far away from one another. Even though they didn’t see each other often, it always felt like no time had passed.
Eight months ago, she matched with a man on a dating app who happened to be mutual friends with her best friend.
When she inquired about him, her best friend said that she’d met him at an after-school club and had gone to prom with him (but she didn’t go to the same school as he did).
Her best friend told her that he was a really nice guy and that she should definitely go out with him. So, she had a phone call with him before going on a date, and they had an amazing conversation.
When she updated her friend about how well things went with him, she made sure it was okay that she continued to pursue things with him, and her friend said she was thrilled for her.
After struggling with PTSD for the last couple of years, her friends said she was so glad to see her happy again.
At the time, her best friend knew that she was going to be getting engaged soon, and her friend invited her along to look at engagement rings to figure out which styles she liked best.
“Another day during her visit, she casually asked me to be her maid of honor,” she explained. “It took me by surprise as I always felt that her other friends were a lot closer to her since they talked all the time because I hadn’t been around for the past few years with everything going on.”
Yevhenii – stock.adobe.com- illustrative purposes only
“I felt overridden with guilt because I hadn’t been who everyone wanted me to be for them for a while now.”
“She ended up saying that she wouldn’t want that role either because of how much responsibility it holds, and I’ve felt bad about it ever since.”
Then, last month, her friend called to talk about the wedding, and she randomly mentioned that it was going to be a destination wedding.
“I backtrack and tell her she hadn’t mentioned this before, and she tells me that she forgot. I asked more questions, and she told me she was planning on me rooming with her friend since it’ll save money (this is a person whom I barely know),” she said.
“And when I ask about my boyfriend, she expresses that she forgot about him and decided that she wants it to be close family and friends only.”
They moved onto the topic of how much this would all cost, and she told her friend she was worried because she wasn’t working much and had a lot of bills to pay.
Her friend reassured her and said that since her wedding wasn’t until November, she had a lot of time to save up and plan for the travel.
“Since then, she’s tried to call me a few times, to which I haven’t responded,” she continued. “I freeze due to overwhelming anxiety.”
“I want to be there for her, and I care about her, but all of these factors make me feel so conflicted.”
“The other day, she texted me that she no longer wants me to be a part of her bridal party (which I didn’t even know I was a part of!) due to my lack of responsiveness (which is fair).”
Over the years, her best friend always expressed that she never wanted a big wedding, so she believes that that could have been part of what motivated her to have a destination wedding and ask her to be the maid of honor.
Do you think she’s right not to want to attend her best friend’s destination wedding?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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