He’s Not Paying For His Son’s College Tuition Because, At 18, His Son Received A College Fund And Decided To Blow It On Two Years-Worth Of Traveling

Maridav - stock.adobe.com-  illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
Maridav - stock.adobe.com- illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

When this man and his wife’s son turned 18-years-old, they allowed his son to access the college fund they had built up. Then, he told his son to do whatever he wanted with the money.

Well, his son wound up using the money to travel and “find himself” over the past two years. And now that his son is 20-years-old, he wants to go back to school.

That’s why his son recently asked him and his wife to pay for the college tuition. But once he asked what happened to the entire college fund, he learned his son had blown it on going around the world.

So, he told his son no and claimed that if his son wanted to go to college, then he “better get a job.”

To be clear, he and his wife did tell his son that the money was free to be used for anything– whether that was college or something else.

“It was my son’s money, after all; we set it aside for him. And we did explain the intent, but he is an adult, and he was free to use it as he pleases,” he said.

In his eyes, his son was an adult after turning 18, and he believes his son was old enough to understand the consequences of his actions.

That’s why, even though they made it clear that the fund was intended to be used for college, he didn’t want to “police” his son.

Apparently, his own dad did the exact same thing for him, and he didn’t use the money to go to school, either. Still, he made a strategic decision and decided to use his own college fund as down payments on two different houses.

Maridav – stock.adobe.com- illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

Then, he rented out the homes– essentially creating two incomes for himself– and asked his dad for help in the process.

He thinks that his son was entirely free to do the same and could have asked him for help.

“My son may not have the knowledge or impulse control, but he is old enough to know it is okay to ask for help if he is unsure how to use said money or has no idea what to do with his life,” he explained.

So, he really doesn’t think he is a monster. He claimed his son is aware of that, too.

For instance, he once helped his son out with the purchase of his first car.

In the beginning, he and his wife told their son to save up enough money to buy the vehicle he wanted.

Then, once their son had reached that financial milestone, he told his son to just keep the money, and he bought the car.

“My son knows I do not do things solely to be a cruel monster,” he vented.

“My son had a bunch of options, and he chose the worst one. But I was not going to forcibly interject my views on him if he did not want to come to ask me for help. And the fact he did not means to me that he didn’t want my guidance.”

Despite his opinion, though, his wife still believes they should just help their son out with the college tuition for the sake of their son’s future.

Yet, he has stuck to his guns– telling his wife no and claiming that their son has to deal with the consequences of his choices.

So now, he’s been left wondering whether refusing to pay for his son’s college tuition after his son blew the money on traveling really makes him a jerk or not.

Do you agree that 18-years-olds are adults who should understand that actions have consequences? If you created a college fund for your child, would you ever just hand it over without following up on how your kid plans to spend it? Even if you disagree with how he did that, do you think he’s now obligated to pay for his son’s college tuition? 

You can read the original post on Reddit here.

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Katharina Buczek graduated from Stony Brook University with a degree in Journalism and a minor in Digital Arts. Specializing ... More about Katharina Buczek

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