Her Husband Was Furious With Her For Not Including Him In Her Latest Pregnancy Scan, And He Called Her Cruel For Robbing Him of The Opportunity
This 30-year-old woman is currently 31 weeks into her pregnancy. Unfortunately, she and her husband, 31, had a huge argument not long ago.
They bickered over the fact that she hadn’t told him she had a scan appointment, and she purposely hadn’t told him because she no longer wanted him to attend these appointments with her because he never seemed to be excited at all.
Over the course of her pregnancy, she hasn’t felt like her husband has provided her with the emotional support she needed. Even though she’s discussed how she feels with him multiple times, he hasn’t made an effort to prioritize her or the pregnancy or act like he cares.
A couple of weeks ago, her husband said that he just started going to therapy to work through trauma due to experiences from his childhood. She thought the timing was a bit strange because she had pleaded with him for many years to go to therapy, and the most recent time she’d requested that he go was right after they learned of the pregnancy.
While pregnancies can be stressful, no matter the circumstances, they hadn’t planned for this pregnancy. This was their first child, and they had only just gotten married and purchased a home together not too long ago. So, clearly, there have been a lot of big life changes for them all at once.
Also, she wanted to be able to have a honeymoon since neither of them had taken a trip since 2019. She doesn’t necessarily want a lavish vacation, but she thinks it would be a good idea for them to carve out some time away, just for the two of them, before their worlds are turned upside down with the birth of their child and all the stress that can come with having a baby.
“My husband has only said that ‘it sounds great,’ but absolutely nothing has come of it. When I presented him with options and dates, he said, ‘He’ll get back to me’ and has just blown it off. Add to this, my husband has barely touched me in the past four months,” she said.
While her husband has not only not been physically close to her in four months, he also won’t hug her, squeeze her shoulders like he used to, and refuses to hold her hand. She tried discussing this drastic shift with him, but he would only tell her that there wasn’t anything wrong, and he would shove her concerns aside.
Even after she expressed that she needed those small signs of physical affection to make her feel assured and cared for, especially considering how the pregnancy was impacting her body, he didn’t make an effort to be more physically affectionate towards her. She even told him that the way he ignored her needs made her feel like she didn’t matter to him and as if she was a roommate and not his wife. However, he still didn’t change.
zinkevych – stock.adobe.com- illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
“My husband was the most enthusiastic about having the baby out of the two of us, but he has literally done nothing to prepare, and every mention of the baby (if it’s kicking or that it hears our voices), he just says ‘Okay,'” she explained.
“I understand that it’s harder for men to grasp the reality of a baby growing but has no opinions and no interest in anything baby-related.”
When her husband informed her that he was attending therapy, he told her that this was a difficult time for him.
“He said that it would mean he would ‘probably’ be more distant, moody, and ‘wouldn’t want to do anything at all.’ I couldn’t help but feel slightly resentful. But I checked myself and just told him I was proud that he was working on himself and that I just wanted him to be happy (which I truly do),” she shared.
Despite feeling happy that her husband was finally going to therapy, she realized how isolated and lonely she had been feeling throughout her entire pregnancy.
While she’d been thrilled and excited when they first found out they were having a baby, now those emotions were dwindling the more time went on.
Sadly, she’s extremely stressed out and doesn’t feel like she has anyone she can count on. Yet she knew that she couldn’t give up, so she planned to attend her pregnancy scan alone a couple of weeks ago.
She arrived home after the appointment, and her husband asked her where she’d gone. After she said that she’d gone to an appointment by herself, he was furious. He told her that she was self-centered and that she’d “‘robbed him’ of his opportunity.”
In response, she told her husband that he wasn’t someone she hadn’t been able to rely on throughout her pregnancy.
She added that over the past several months, he’s acted like he doesn’t care, and he hasn’t provided her with any kind of support whatsoever.
Then, he reminded him that he himself claimed that he doesn’t feel motivated to help her at all, so she asked him why she should assume that he randomly decides that he has an interest in her and the pregnancy.
The fight continued, and she said that she’d much rather go to all her appointments alone from here on out instead of waiting with false hopes for him to suddenly act as if this pregnancy matters to him.
Her husband told her that she was “cruel,” and they had barely spoken since the argument.
What would you do if you were in her shoes?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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