Rebecca Meyer
This 30-year-old woman is currently 31 weeks into her pregnancy. Unfortunately, she and her husband, 31, had a huge argument not long ago.
They bickered over the fact that she hadn’t told him she had a scan appointment, and she purposely hadn’t told him because she no longer wanted him to attend these appointments with her because he never seemed to be excited at all.
Over the course of her pregnancy, she hasn’t felt like her husband has provided her with the emotional support she needed. Even though she’s discussed how she feels with him multiple times, he hasn’t made an effort to prioritize her or the pregnancy or act like he cares.
A couple of weeks ago, her husband said that he just started going to therapy to work through trauma due to experiences from his childhood. She thought the timing was a bit strange because she had pleaded with him for many years to go to therapy, and the most recent time she’d requested that he go was right after they learned of the pregnancy.
While pregnancies can be stressful, no matter the circumstances, they hadn’t planned for this pregnancy. This was their first child, and they had only just gotten married and purchased a home together not too long ago. So, clearly, there have been a lot of big life changes for them all at once.
Also, she wanted to be able to have a honeymoon since neither of them had taken a trip since 2019. She doesn’t necessarily want a lavish vacation, but she thinks it would be a good idea for them to carve out some time away, just for the two of them, before their worlds are turned upside down with the birth of their child and all the stress that can come with having a baby.
“My husband has only said that ‘it sounds great,’ but absolutely nothing has come of it. When I presented him with options and dates, he said, ‘He’ll get back to me’ and has just blown it off. Add to this, my husband has barely touched me in the past four months,” she said.
While her husband has not only not been physically close to her in four months, he also won’t hug her, squeeze her shoulders like he used to, and refuses to hold her hand. She tried discussing this drastic shift with him, but he would only tell her that there wasn’t anything wrong, and he would shove her concerns aside.
Even after she expressed that she needed those small signs of physical affection to make her feel assured and cared for, especially considering how the pregnancy was impacting her body, he didn’t make an effort to be more physically affectionate towards her. She even told him that the way he ignored her needs made her feel like she didn’t matter to him and as if she was a roommate and not his wife. However, he still didn’t change.
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