She Took A Break From Her Boyfriend After He Uninvited Her From His Child’s Birthday Dinner
This 38-year-old woman has a 40-year-old boyfriend who has kids with his ex-wife. Her boyfriend and his ex split custody of their kids and try to remain civil with one another.
Her boyfriend and his ex do hate one another and avoid being in the same room. Her boyfriend has three kids still living at home, and she gets along decently with them.
His oldest daughter is currently a freshman in college but became somewhat distant from him amid the divorce.
She has three kids of her own from a previous relationship, and her kids enjoy being around her boyfriend’s kids.
“To be clear he was divorced when we started dating,” she explained. “The ex-wife despises me for unclear reasons. I never talk ill of this woman to his kids or anything like that.”
“When his 10-year-old told me that her mom doesn’t like me, I simply said, “That’s okay; she doesn’t have to. But she must be doing something right because she’s raised really wonderful kids.” His kids seem to genuinely like me, and I like them.”
Her boyfriend never gets invited to attend holidays or birthdays when his kids are with their mom. It’s not an issue, as her boyfriend does his own celebrations with his kids.
Recently, her boyfriend’s teen daughter had a birthday, and she planned to go out to dinner at her favorite restaurant.
Her boyfriend asked his daughter if it was alright for her and her kids to attend, and his daughter was perfectly alright with that, as they have all been out to eat together tons of times.
Oksana Moroz – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
“I got a call from my boyfriend the day of the dinner, and he sounded stressed out and almost manic,” she said.
“He said he doesn’t know how it happened but that “somehow” his ex-wife invited herself to the birthday dinner at the restaurant and that his eldest college freshman daughter wants to attend but only if I’m not there (she wants it to be family only).”
“If he’d said from the start that it would be their family only, that would have been fine. I was bothered by the fact that 1) we had already made the plans, and my kids were excited, and 2) he wasn’t being very straightforward about the “dis-invite.”
Her boyfriend then blurted out that his evil ex-wife was manipulating and trapping him, but he refused to create boundaries with his ex and let her know that she couldn’t come.
She knew nothing really mattered except for her boyfriend’s daughter and how she wanted to celebrate her birthday.
So, she had a brief conversation with her boyfriend’s daughter to mention that she has no problem staying at home so that she can have a nice time with her sister and mom.
She reassured her boyfriend’s daughter that she was not mad and that they could have dinner together on a different night.
She wanted to give her boyfriend’s daughter the room to decide what she wanted without getting pressured from her into doing anything.
“She was upset and said she didn’t want to go anymore and asked if I would just pick up some takeout for them to avoid any more drama. I went and got the food,” she added.
“My BF was straight up freaking out at this point, pacing around the house and not managing his emotions very well (slamming doors and drawers somewhat, swearing a lot).”
She got dinner organized along with her boyfriend’s mom, and then her boyfriend began screaming at one of her kids for accidentally dropping a fork on the floor.
She was so upset that she grabbed her kids and left, but not before insisting her boyfriend needed to calm down. Later on, he texted her to say she was unsupportive.
The problem for her is that her boyfriend is well aware that she never wants to allow her kids to be unnecessarily yelled at, let alone by him.
“He said he was just stressed from the events of the day and his ex’s manipulations, but that he acknowledges he should have stood up for me to his ex,” she continued.
“I’m feeling…confused. My gut said to get out of that house because he was acting like a bomb ready to explode. I feel awful that his daughter’s birthday evening was ruined. I’m not sure where I really stand in this relationship anymore. ”
“The last thing I ever want to do is undermine their family unit, but it would have been nice if he had told his ex off the bat, “We’ve already made dinner plans with GF, and I’m not disinviting her.” Especially after dating for 2 years. But I’m also thinking I don’t really have a right to be upset because these ARE his kids and their family has to come first.”
After wondering if she needed to get over herself, she decided to ultimately take a break from her boyfriend over the birthday mess.
She said to him that she needs some time to think about what happened, which only made him freak out.
Her boyfriend responded that she’s unfairly expecting him to be perfect while dealing with his nightmare ex and that he’s actually trying his hardest.
Do you think she made the right choice to take a break, and do you think she should give her boyfriend another chance?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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