His Wife Had An Affair With Her Boss But Won’t Quit Her Job

Jordi - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
Jordi - stock.adobe.com - illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

Eleven years ago, this 30-year-old man met his 38-year-old wife, and they have two kids together who are six and two.

He knows that they have had a tough marriage due to many things outside of their control. They each come from very damaged families and have had to spend a lot of time helping their loved ones to the detriment of their marriage.

His wife has also struggled with health issues during each of her pregnancies, and she battled postpartum depression after giving birth to their firstborn.

After his wife had their first child, she resigned from her job and studied for the following year, which he supported.

But then his wife had a difficult time trying to find a new job, so she was unemployed until after she got pregnant with their second child.

As this was all going on, he felt stressed out handling their finances and caring for their home by himself.

“Our romantic life was almost non-existent, and I felt like we were just 2 grownups living together with kids, nothing more,” he explained.

Two summers ago, he left his wife as he couldn’t picture a future with her. His wife failed to see why he asked for a separation, and he felt too broken to try to give their marriage another go.

He hoped that leaving would give them the opportunity to work on themselves and maybe find their way back to one another in the end.

Jordi – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person

While they were separated, he began seeing another woman, and when his wife found out, she flipped.

His wife clearly thought that they could reconcile, while he wasn’t convinced. But then, last summer, he and his wife began spending more time together while doing things with their kids, and they did start to reconnect.

They thought that perhaps their marriage could work, so they resumed a relationship, sold their home, and bought a new place to live in for a fresh start.

When they moved into their new home, everything was wonderful, but they didn’t speak about what had gone down during their separation, let alone their feelings.

“I knew this would have to come up eventually, but I wanted to give it time for us to set everything in place first,” he said.

“And our relationship felt better than ever before until 3 weeks back. This is where I started to get a bad feeling. I saw micro behavior from my partner that didn’t make sense. She took away her phone as soon as I went into the room, etc. Small stuff. And 2 weeks ago, I took the courage to investigate this.”

“So one night, I went through her messages and saw that she had texted her boss at her new work. And what I could read from it was a lot of regular talk but also with a very flirty intent; they longed for each other and talked about how they needed to wait at work until everyone had left before they could give each other a hug. So with this, I confirmed with myself that it was indeed something going on.”

The following evening, his wife told him she had to stay late at work, and when she arrived home, he confronted her and simply said he felt she was being secretive about something.

She denied it all the way, so then he informed her that he read her text messages to her boss. Then, his wife admitted the truth; she hadn’t been working overtime; she had stayed late to spend time with her boss.

She said all they did was kiss and hug and it only happened two more times beforehand. The next morning, he and his wife took off from work to stay home and have a long chat. In fact, they stayed home from work for an entire week to work through everything.

He believes that what he did while they were separated was the cause of his wife cheating on him with her boss.

His wife also admitted that she’s not positive about their marriage, even though she’s been pretending everything is great.

They have since gone to therapy together, and their therapist has said they need to create some requirements to heal and move on.

He has asked his wife to quit her job, as he feels uneasy about her working with her boss, but his wife is refusing to do so.

His wife argued that she doesn’t want to quit and risk being put in a bad situation again, with the potential that he leaves her and she’s unemployed.

He just feels sick to his stomach that his wife won’t give up her job, which is his one requirement for him to forgive her.

“I want to fix this, but not at any cost,” he continued. “I think a lot about the kids and that I want to give her another chance for them to be able to have one family.”

“Do you think it’s possible to forgive and forget in this situation? I don’t know, everything hurts; I feel lost and sad.”

You can read the original post on Reddit here.

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