She Hates Living With Her Husband, But Doesn’t Want To Divorce Him
It’s not a recent occurrence that this 26-year-old woman and her 27-year-old husband have been struggling with dividing up their household chores.
They got married six months ago and have been together for four years in total. She’s unfortunately been left with having to clean the majority of their apartment on her own, and while she asks her husband to help out more, it never actually happens.
Her husband will promise to pitch in and can go a week doing that, but then everything slides backward and falls on her to complete alone.
For more than a year now, she and her husband have been stuck in this pattern, and it happened after they moved into a larger apartment.
She and her husband both have full-time careers. Her husband’s job is more taxing in a physical sense, while hers is more taxing mentally.
They previously agreed that she would do 60% of the household chores while her husband would do 40%.
This was a fair arrangement, as there are some things she can easily accomplish during her lunch break as she works from home.
Although they came to an agreement on how to divide up the household chores, she’s left doing 80% while her husband completes around 20%.
She feels like her husband’s maid, as she has to pick up after him nonstop. Their apartment never gets to be cleaned fully, as she cannot keep up. She’s actually exhausted from having to do everything basically by herself.
LIGHTFIELD STUDIOS – stock.adobe.com – illustrative purposes only, not the actual person
Anytime she complains to her husband, he shuts her down and insists she’s being a nag.
“Now he has been on a business trip for a total of two weeks, coming back the coming weekend,” she explained.
“And I don’t want him to. I was even happy when he told me his boss prolonged his trip, because that gave me more time to get on top of the household tasks. It’s so clean. And neat. No empty energy drink cans around.”
“No smelly dishes that stand around for days unless I put them away. There is actually an end to housework, not the usual “there is more, but I am exhausted.” It smells fresh. I feel calm. It’s so quiet. I actually have had the energy to try out new recipes and go for walks and stuff. I feel great.”
She loves her husband, she truly does, but her love for him has been buried underneath the weight of her exhaustion with their home situation.
Her husband is a wonderful person but the worst roommate you could possibly have. So, she’s left feeling like he’s not actually a good husband because of this.
She also believes her husband is failing her as a partner since a partner should be supportive instead of taxing their significant other.
“I just don’t know what to do with this realization,” she continued. “Has anyone been there and has any solution that isn’t breaking up or moving out?”
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
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