These Are The Keys You Need To Ensure That Your Relationship Stands The Test Of Time
The following column is the opinion and analysis of the writer. It’s arguably much easier to love someone than to create a relationship that can stand the test of time.
The pull you feel toward a partner is chemical, emotional, and sometimes illogical. It can be spontaneous, erratic, and both beautiful and messy.
But while falling in love often entails leading with your heart, even the most love-filled relationships don’t always last. And I don’t have to tell you how painful that can be.
The fact of the matter is that love alone is not enough to sustain a functioning and healthy relationship, regardless of how much chemistry you share.
Instead, it’s the cornerstones of how you interact and treat each other that will differentiate passion-filled flings from strong and stable partnerships.
To go beyond a romantic bond and foster a genuine relationship, you will need to incorporate these keys to long-lasting love.
Communicate To Stay Connected
You’ve probably heard this a million times, but the value of communication in relationships cannot be overstated enough. Without open and honest conversations, you and your partner may be on completely different pages (and never even realize it until it’s too late).
This is true for all matters and issues, whether they’re seemingly small and insignificant or large. If you stay quiet about anything, from frustrating habits to outright hurtful actions or remarks, you will develop resentment over time.
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The worst part? Your upset will never be remedied because you’re not creating an avenue for your feelings to be discussed and worked through. If you never speak up, you are not giving your partner the opportunity to hear you out.
This idea goes both ways, too. Both partners in relationships must commit themselves to communicating their thoughts and feelings, as well as actively listening and addressing any conflicts in a constructive matter.
The good news is that communicating is quite simple. The scariest part is usually just thinking about what you want to say. Once your feelings are out in the open, your partner should give you a safe space to express yourself. And if they’re unwilling or unable, that’s something you will need to address through transparent dialogue.
Build Trust And Understanding
Trust and understanding are two more marks of a relationship that will last. It’s impossible to go further than the “honeymoon phase” without showing both to your partner and receiving it in return.
In order to build trust, couples must be reliable, consistent, and honest with each other. They should respect each other’s boundaries but also feel like commitments and promises are kept.
Understanding goes hand-in-hand with trust. There will be times when life gets chaotic, and certain habits fall by the wayside. For instance, your partner may take longer to respond to texts or have less free time for outings during a busy season at work.
Amidst these natural ebbs and flows, understanding where your partner is coming from and showing empathy toward their situation will allow your trust to remain intact. And again, both trust and understanding are significantly easier to practice when communication is frequent and open.
Don’t Leave Individuality Behind
When partners enter relationships, one of the biggest mistakes they can make is losing touch with their own sense of self.
Of course, partnerships are grown through unity and the sharing of values and interests. However, it can be dangerous to merge with your partner completely.
You’ve probably known a friend who entered a relationship and seemingly took on their partner’s persona. Your friend might’ve stopped hanging out with their own social circle or participating in their typical hobbies. In place of those interests, they began only seeing their partner’s acquaintances and taking part in activities their partner enjoyed.
It’s completely natural for couples to try out things their significant other enjoys, as well as become part of their respective friend groups. However, if you completely abandon your own individual friends and interests, you may feel as though you’ve lost touch with yourself over time.
As you delve deeper into your relationship with your partner, be sure to pay equal attention to your own personal growth and make time for independent ventures. Encourage your partner to pursue their own goals and dreams, too.
Two well-rounded and fulfilled individuals will always come together to form a stronger relationship than two halves of a whole.
Use Quality Time To Keep The Spark Alive
Last but not least is quality time, an overlooked factor that’s crucial to the longevity of relationships.
Too often, when schedules get busy and personal struggles rear their ugly heads, partners find themselves entrenched in responsibilities and don’t dedicate enough time to their relationship.
But no matter how much work it takes, you must carve out dedicated time to nurture your romantic connection with your partner. For some, this might look like scheduled date nights once every week or two. For others, this can be an hour before bed each night when you catch up without any outside distractions.
Passion and emotional bonds are what differentiate friendships from romantic endeavors. It can be easy to fall into a friend or roommate-like pattern over time as you and your partner become accustomed to the same routine.
Remember to switch things up and break the mold. Try out new experiences together, go on vacations when you can, and make it a point to connect with each other in some way every single day.
If you both feel appreciated, loved, and emotionally close, it will make showing understanding and having clarity during conflict resolution that much more straightforward.
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